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Episode 212: Daniel M.

Season 15, Episode 12

danielM

Daniel M.
Age: 43
Location: Laguna Niguel, California
Addiction: Alcohol (vodka)

What’s Memorable: This one is painful. Taking care of someone who could literally die if they don’t get alcohol into their system is beyond exhausting and constantly terrifying. Making sure they have enough alcohol in order to stay alive another day while knowing that you’re helping them stay addicted, it’s just too much. And then also having to watch them take a bunch of pills that could easily result in an overdose and not being able to do anything about it? No one should ever have to deal with that kind of turmoil. I have nothing but empathy for Sandi and their family and friends. They did what they had to do to keep him alive, and calling Intervention may have been the thing that actually saved his life.  I really hope so, he has a lot to live for and his family deserves to be happy.

Official Synopsis: Daniel is a well-respected Paranormal expert. However, his sensitivity leaves him tormented by those entities needing to cross to the other side. Daniel is now consuming a gallon of vodka per day to quiet the voices. That, combined with easy access to pain meds and opiates Daniel takes for his lupus diagnosis, has left him spiraling out of control. His family fears that it is only a matter of time before he is lost inside a world he cannot escape.

Date Aired:  June 2016
Interventionist:
Candy

Categories: Alcohol, Candy, Medical Problem, Mental Problems, Season 15

Discussion

39 Responses to “Episode 212: Daniel M.”

  1. The interventionist was actually Candy.

    Posted by Sandi | June 26, 2016, 9:01 pm
  2. am I the only one who thinks he seems like a deeply closeted gay man?

    Posted by Simone B. | June 27, 2016, 7:27 pm
  3. I definitely find the alcoholic episodes the most interesting for personal reasons, and this story disturbed me the way an episode hasn’t in a long time. The way he was shaking and the handfuls of pills he was shoving in his mouth to go with a gallon of vodka, it’s amazing he was still alive. And I can’t believe they still held an intervention when he was completely incoherent from a massive overdose, just because the nurse took his vital signs. It seemed negligent and downright dangerous that they didn’t take him to the ER just to be safe. Okay and then the guy at one of the rehabs said “Physically he’s okay…mentally I’m not so sure” like, can you elaborate? I mean, my feelings on ~paranormal investigators~ aside, he didn’t seem particularly mentally ill (alcoholism aside, obviously). Idk idk, it was intense. Hope he’s doing okay.

    Posted by Tom | June 28, 2016, 10:17 am
    • I agree — he certainly did not seem “okay” by the end of the episode. He looked like a man being crushed by his inner demons, enduring until he could get access to his preferred medicine again. I’m sure that he was getting psychiatric counseling while in rehab, but I did not have a great feeling — his desire to move closer to his son seemed less like a concerned parent, and more like an alcoholic that was formulating a reason to get out of rehab ASAP.

      My heart goes out to him; I hope that he can get the help he needs.

      Posted by Sean | June 28, 2016, 12:34 pm
    • I would have liked more of an explanation as well. I was also a touch troubled by how suddenly outwardly religious he seemed to Candy and the camera crew at the end. I don’t mean to say this in a way that mocks religion. It was that his words and attitude seemed like a caricature of a religious person. It seemed disingenuous. And hey, I could very well be wrong, and I hope I am. A lot of editing happens, so who knows.

      Posted by Sara | June 28, 2016, 2:10 pm
      • Yeah, you’re right, although it could be just a result of being new to recovery and parroting the talk that he’s hearing about higher powers, prayer, etc. But yes, I get that they only have so much time for an episode and as a result a lot of things get cut, but that shouldn’t be at the expense of prevalent information, y’know? Like, Candy started a discussion about his potentially not even having lupus, and his mother confirmed that as a kid he used to enjoy pretending to be sick. Plus, when someone claims they’re being tormented by voices nobody else can hear, conventional wisdom doesn’t dictate that they’re actually just in touch with the supernatural. Like, they threw out all these breadcrumbs about a potential underlying mental illness, but didn’t elaborate on it at all. I guess we won’t know until there’s a follow up, or maybe someone who knows him comments.

        Posted by Tom | June 29, 2016, 7:58 am
      • I agree, I felt he was acting disingenuous towards the end. I also agree with Sean’s commenting about Daniel’s potential reason to want to move closer to his son.

        Posted by MC | July 1, 2016, 9:46 am
      • Well stated ! #editing

        Posted by Brian | July 24, 2016, 6:18 pm
  4. Morphine, Lortab, other opiates, cough syrup, a gallon of vodka a day, seizure meds- and that was just what was mentioned on the episode.

    Posted by Kristy | June 29, 2016, 1:28 am
  5. Hi all. This is Sandi, Danny’s wife. First, I want to thank you all for being kind. I have seen on some boards the most horrendous things and although I know I shouldn’t read the comments, I did. They were hurtful. I’ll address some of the questions you guys have. Who Danny is is extremely layered. I’ve been married to the man for years and I still am finding out that I may not have even known him at all. They only touched on the mental aspect for a few reasons. Nothing definitive was found while in rehab because at the first rehab, he spent a great portion of the time detoxing. Then he sprung a leak and relapsed. He was then sent to Florida where they found some things but haven’t gotten to the root issue(s). They were mainly focused on the addiction, then decided to treat any mental issues later.
    What they didn’t show, and no fault to anyone, was that Danny is incredibly funny and caring. He lost all of that in the addiction. When we married we were best friends and we are all mourning the Danny we lost. I think many times it’s easy to see something like that and forget that the cognitive abilities are disrupted due to the massive amounts of drugs and alcohol he was putting into his system.
    It’s so hard, now, to show people how amazing he can be. We were pushed into a corner and had no choice but to contact the show for help. It was the LAST thing his mom, sister or I wanted to do. We did it out of love for an amazing soul that was/ is tormented. How we came across, I don’t know. But we went on the show for help and that’s what we got, so for that, I’m grateful. Thanks guys!

    Posted by Sandi | June 29, 2016, 10:00 am
    • Hi Sandi! Danny’s story moved me deeply, and I just want you to know that you, Danny, and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that he is able to receive all the help he needs, and that he recovers to live a full and rewarding life. I also wanted you to know that all of you came across as a loving family who is terrified of losing Danny. I wish only the best for you, your family, and Danny. I’m sorry you’ve seen cruel comments on various boards; people can be heartless and thoughtless, especially with the anonymity of the Internet. Thank you for taking the time to tell us more about Danny, and please know that there are people out there who are pulling for his recovery and for your family’s health and happiness.

      Posted by Shannon | June 29, 2016, 10:56 am
      • Thank you Shannon. I chose to respond here because you all were so nice in your comments. It’s crazy how people see 45 minutes of heavily edited video and suddenly feel that they are experts on your life and because we needed help in the form such as this, that we are fair game for insults and hateful comments. Because I had moved out, they were unable to show him hacking into my phone, the verbal attacks, the accusations he placed on me; typical projection. In the months leading up to this he had attempted suicide four times in one night, been hospitalized numerous times, was found hallucinating on the patio with a loaded gun in his waistband. I had contacted the police several times for help, not that he was physically abusive, he was hallucinating due to the meds and alcohol combo. I called casting so many times over Christmas begging them to come or he was going to die. They actually pulled his taping closer because of the shape he was in.

        Posted by Sandi | June 29, 2016, 11:20 am
      • Hello, This was a thought provoking episode on several layers. I normally don’t comment on such. I have so many questions. Since Danny seized without alcohol, did he get alcohol while in rehab? Was Danny BiPolar? How is it possible to drink a bottle of Vodka a day without getting drunk or Liver damage.

        At any rate I am pulling for Danny and his family.

        Posted by flinstone | November 22, 2016, 6:14 pm
    • Sandi, thank you for commenting here. I think it’s awesome that Dizzy has created a safer place for people to share. Not an easy task on the Internet. There is a lot to say about how I feel the show focused more on the success of the paranormal renowned speaker and the “fall from grace ” as it were as opposed to the loving husband and father who was adopted if I remember correctly. To have the courage and let a camera crew tape one of the most devastating things in life is a profound act of love, and while I was left with many questions during and after the program, it was certainly no question that you genuinely cared for this man. All of my best to you and your family.

      Posted by Sara | June 29, 2016, 4:40 pm
    • Hi Sandi, thank you for clarifying. And I’m sorry you had to see all sorts of hateful comments. I think a lot of people watch Intervention because they have their own struggles with substance abuse, and unfortunately some try to make themselves feel better by focusing on someone who seems even “worse,” as if by mocking that person they can somehow distance themselves from their own issues. Then again, some people are just awful for no reason.
      I’m glad the intervention helped and I hope Danny continues healing; you’re right, this disease tends to destroy all the best about a person.
      One thing I wanted to ask you, and I hope it’s not too weird, but what is your arm tattoo of? I happen to have Hebrew letters tattooed in the same exact spot on my arm, so when I caught a glimpse of yours I did a double take.
      All the best

      Posted by Tom | June 29, 2016, 6:59 pm
      • I also wanted to know about the Hebrew lettering tattoo. Thank you Sandi for responding. I feel that Candy is very wise and in the case of Danny’s recovery, she’s completely right about him having a shot at success. It’s just going to take some work on part of him and the family. He CAN do it, and so can you and family. There is a “good people” vibe about y’all. Keep to it!

        Posted by Gloria | June 30, 2016, 9:58 pm
    • I mean this with all respect, but it must be asked–if Danny could address this demon the way he addresses the ones he handles professionally, how would the conversation go?

      If he could get it to speak for itself, what would it say? What would it say it wants? What does it do to earn Danny’s loyalty? Does it love him? Does it hate him? is it jealoius of his other loves and attachments? Does it seek to use Danny to hurt Sandi and Gabriel? What is its endgame in this–does it take pleasure in tormenting these people, and will it let the torment end somehow, or does it seek to prolong all this agony? Is Danny its enemy or is Danny a weapon it uses?

      I keep watching Danny fighting it, but I want to hear its own voice, and I want it to reveal what it seeks. Watching this I can feel it hiding behind his reason and his despair. The interventionist said it “is his medicine, his best friend, it doesn’t talk back to him”–can it be drawn out and made to show its face?

      Sandi, your courage is exemplary.

      Posted by DC | July 3, 2016, 7:33 pm
    • Hi Sandi. I just watched the first few minutes and I know what he is dealing with. He was right by saying it is demonic. Danny has a spiritual gift of being a seer. His religious background teaches this but wasn’t made relevant. The addiction is a way to silence what he experiences. You might not be a Christian, but the truth is that the spiritual world you both went after is because God gifted you both with prophetic gifts. God has a plan for both of you. I think your antennae is not connected to the right frequency, but Jesus still loves you both so much.

      Posted by Levi | February 12, 2017, 1:24 pm
  6. Hi Sandi, was there anything definitive found out about his Lupis?

    Posted by Alice | June 29, 2016, 12:28 pm
  7. Sandi, you’re right. All we see is a heavily edited, 45 minute snapshot of what you have been living through for years. I’m so glad that you contacted the show, and especially that they moved up production; I will continue to hope and pray that you all get through this and that Danny can recover. I have never been in your shoes, and I can only imagine how frightening, frustrating, and devastatingly sad it is to see someone you love so much go through this – not to mention all that you and your family have gone through as a result. I hope you’ll keep us posted, if you can, on his progress. And if you read negative comments, try to think of it as only noise. Everyone loves to play “armchair quarterback,” but only you and your family know what’s truly going on. My husband and I will continue keeping you, Danny, and your family in our most positive thoughts and prayers.

    Posted by Shannon | June 29, 2016, 3:13 pm
  8. Hi! I only have a second because I’m at work, but I wanted to answer the question about my tat. It’s Hebrew for YHWH. It’s in reference to my favorite verse, “I am that I am.” Ex. 3:14. Regarding the lupus, nothing definitive yet. Before I could get an answer, he moved to transitional living.

    Posted by sandi | June 29, 2016, 8:12 pm
  9. This episode really hit home for me, what you said to your husband is the exact things I’ve been feeling. I too have a 6 yr old son and his father relapsed after 5 yrs sobriety. This has been an awful nightmare I wish would end. Everything in this episode is my life it took me awhile to realize I’m not alone I too fear we will lose him to this disease he has severe health problems due to his addiction. Please know that you are not alone and remember one day at a time that’s all we got. It’s hard to make that decision to walk away when our son’s need there dad’s. I will continue to pray for you and your family. Stay strong

    Posted by Jean Klemme | July 3, 2016, 5:08 pm
  10. I was discussing this with a friend and we were trying to determine, at the beginning, when we first see him pouring and then gulping the vodka, was that straight vodka he was pouring into a coffee mug and gulping, twice in a row?

    I noticed that when he was pouring into his red coffee mug, you can clearly see what looks like coffee in there.

    I’m just gobsmacked at his consumption.
    I read elsewhere on a subforum and the most of the members have just thrown their hands up to being alcoholics. The amounts they post they consume and the ill effects are nothing short of jarring.

    Still, his consumption during the intro deeply disturbed me, and we’ve seen some prolific hard liquor drinkers over the years on Intervention.

    What was the consensus as you watched it? Was he drinking straight vodka, nothing mixed in it, during the intro?

    Posted by clairebarecares | July 5, 2016, 9:16 pm
  11. Re: mental issues, Daniel’s story made me think of schizotypal PD: https://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/001525.htm

    Especially in relation to his early childhood experiences, the “drifter” thing, etc. This episode really killed me, godspeed to him & his family!

    Posted by artemisia | July 6, 2016, 1:06 am
  12. Sandi,
    You and Danny’s family seem like incredibly warm, caring individuals who are really trying to fight the good fight with Danny. It is so amazing for you to a) even look at this site, and b) post about Danny’s treatment progress.

    I’m not a religious person, but I have you all in my thoughts. I especially hope that this situation improves in the future for your son so that he may be able to know his father.

    Best of wishes!

    Posted by Dr.LT | July 6, 2016, 6:24 pm
  13. Hi…does anyone know if Daniel is ok? I know it’s only been a couple of months but this episode pulled at my heart so much. Also was there ever any talk of schizophrenia with his docs in rehab?

    Posted by Maryjane | September 30, 2016, 4:53 am
  14. Hi Mary Jane,
    Thank you for asking about Danny. He just came back to California and is sober and healthy! He is working and is planning on speaking at events regarding his sobriety. His humor is back and his heart is beating. He is getting back on his feet and is in a good place. Every day is being taken as a gift because he was incredibly close to losing everything.

    Posted by Sandi | September 30, 2016, 3:39 pm
  15. Sandi-
    Danny’s episode really touched my heart, it reminded me of my father before he passed (at 37 years old) I pray that you and your family are doing well and that Danny continues on his path of soberity. I cried my eyes out when I saw him in that state the day of his intervention. I’m am so happy to hear that he is sober and doing well. I wanted to know if they found out if he has Lupus or if he has a mental disorder? I pray that Danny can remain sober and that he has realized what he truly has. You can tell that the love you have for him is just amazing. God bless you & your family this upcoming holiday season.

    Posted by Melissa Ritchey | November 23, 2016, 8:20 pm
  16. Just watching this episode now and noticed that it said Danny is 43 years old if you wanted to update the description. Thank you so much for all you do on this website…I am so grateful it exists!

    Posted by Caroline | January 13, 2017, 5:00 pm
  17. Dear Sandi,

    Thank you for replying to some of the questions on this forum. I have been through this situation with my best friend who is like a brother. I had a different experience because I was able to disconnect more than you were able to because of your child etc.

    I thought I would never be able to continue my relationship with my bestie because there were so many negative associations, thinking of him only caused me pain. He did eventually, after much turmoil, get sober.

    The amount of abuse he inflicted on his body made me think he could never be normal again. It’s been over 8 years with him sober. He slowly “thawed” out and became himself again. It’s unbelievable what we can recover from. My bestie is 100% himself again, in fact, even better. Stronger.

    I just wanted to offer hope from the other side. If he can’t be your husband anymore, that is understandable. At least your son can get to know the man you married. You are so articulate and caring, you have been an inspiration.

    Posted by jk | January 18, 2017, 2:34 am
  18. Wishing Sandi and Daniel the very best.

    Posted by Melanie | February 12, 2017, 7:01 pm
  19. This episode was difficult to watch. To witness someone on the verge of taking their own life (as a person who has been to that dark place in my mind), is heartbreaking. I hope for the best for Daniel and his family.

    I do want to also say, I am currently living with lupus. My diagnosis was almost 2 years ago, and in the beginning, my symptoms were similar to Daniel’s (the extreme fatigue, severe body pain, in addition to stomach/bowel problems, every day headaches, just to name a few). Fast forward to now, still haven’t found the right combination of meds and my pain level is never below about a 5-6, and I’m only 34 and have no quality of life compared to my life before lupus. Sandi, when you said that “he found the perfect disease to hide behind”, it kind of felt like a slap on the face. People don’t understand/realize how little control you have over your body when lupus takes over. It’s miserable. However, I do understand that this must have been extremely difficult to put your family out there for everyone to see and that your heart is obviously breaking for your husband. So maybe you didn’t mean to be insensitive, but lupus is real, and it can affect every part of your life. As I don’t know Daniel personally, I can’t say whether he uses lupus as an excuse or not, but I just want people to be aware that it’s possible he really did feel awful for days at a time. Being in the sun for too long causes me to be laid up on the couch sick/sleeping for about 3 days.

    Anyway, thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this.

    Be kind. You never know what silent battles someone may be fighting.

    Posted by Christine | August 1, 2017, 12:40 am
  20. Just the way he throws back those huge glasses of (pretty much straight) vodka like it’s nothing. Damn

    Posted by Mal | September 2, 2017, 3:25 pm
  21. Hi Sandi. My husband is a severe alcoholic (age 38 and diagnosed with cirrhosis recently). He supposedly hasn’t any booze since 5/25/17. He swapped that addiction for “whip its” and marijuana. Any kind of inhalant actually, anyway, wanted to reach out and wish you and your husband well. You and your husband deserve some peace ✌

    Posted by Sad | September 11, 2017, 2:37 pm

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