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S8E4 Andrew

Season 8, Episode 4

Andrew

Age:  21
Location: London, Ontario, Canada
Addicted to: OxyContin
What’s Memorable: The living in a motel room with his 2 little brothers and father because his addiction (and his dad’s gambling) has bankrupted them.

Official synopsis:  Once bright, likable, and athletic, Andrew has become a gaunt, menacing OxyContin addict. As a child, Andrew learned to manipulate his father, Dan, who now admits, “I can’t stand up to Andrew. He’ll threaten to commit crimes and trash our motel room. I’d rather give him money for a pill than have him out robbing innocent people.” Andrew, his father, and two brothers have been evicted seven times due to property damage and financial hardship, and they can go days without food. Can an intervention help Andrew–and make his father realize that if he doesn’t get tough with Andrew, the whole family will be destroyed?

Original Air Date: July 2010
Interventionist: Jeff

Comments
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Comments

  1. ashley

    where am I able to watch this episode?

    1. Dizzy

      Netflix streaming is your best bet. All of Seasons 1-10 are there. If you don’t have Netflix you may be able to catch it on the A&E site or Hulu but no guarantees, those sites rotate the episodes they make available.

  2. Robert Maybeth

    It’s being shown on LMN (sp?) network on time warner as of today July 31 2014.

  3. Jordy

    This was a scary episode, what with the situation with the dad and younger brothers. What ever happened to this family?

  4. InterventionAddict

    Hands down my favorite family–Andrew, his bros, and his dad that is. The loyalty of the brothers to both Andrew and their dad was powerful and moving. So too the dad’s loyalty to his sons.

    Yeah, it may have been “dysfunctional” … but one hardly finds that level of loyalty and love in even the most functional families (If such a family even exists).

    I’d sure like to find some update on Andrew et al.

  5. kitty katt

    The part that killed me was when the younger brother spoke at the intervention saying he would go to school hungry and have no money for lunch just so Andrew can have money for his drugs.

  6. Alexis J

    Anyone know how Andrew and his family are doing now? I caught a reairing of this episode this week and saw the end note that Andrew had relapsed briefly on heroin, then returned to treatment and has been sober since 2010, but it’s been awhile! I was touched by the love and pain this family shared and really wish the best for all of them.

  7. Clois Reid

    I would LOVE an update on this family! Anyone know?

  8. Alice Schmid

    what about the dad?

  9. KM

    Did they ever say why the mom kicked all of her kids out?

  10. Brooke

    i gotta be honest, i initially felt sympathy for the mom. i think the dad’s inability to discipline and set boundaries caused this whole mess. for the obvious reasons (no consequences and too much freedom) but also bc it made the boys hate their mom and think that her discipline was lack of love. of course then she went off the rails and although probably a lot of that was frustration and desperation as a result of the dad’s inability to discipline and set boundaries, you still don’t do that to your kids. i also get SO frustrated by the episodes with INSANE levels of codependency and enabling. to the point where the father is ruining his other kid’s lives. the other kids have to go hungry so andrew can have $ for drugs? he allows andrew to do drugs right in front of the other kids? and of course the gambling. i honestly feel like child protective services should have been called in long ago for all that abuse. but luckily andrew got help with the drugs as well as the dad with the gambling and they all seem to be doing well. because in the end, it’s clear they love each other so much and a healthy together family is the ideal. i hope they are still in a good place.

    1. Sudie

      I really have issues with the dad. I have a feeling that even though he quit gambling, he may still be a pushover…even after rehab. My family situation is similar.

  11. Maggie S

    Anyone else weirdly never watch this one before? I’ve seen every episode multiple times and always would scroll past because the photo they use reminded me of a different person whose episode I’ve seen too many times.

    When dad is in rehab and says he can’t wait to be in charge, what a moment. Wishing the best for these guys!

  12. Sudie

    The dad gets under my skin. Not very fond of him, really, but I do hope he is thriving. The younger boys deserve more stability, which his aunts and uncles can give him.

  13. Bob

    Unfortunately, 10 years later Things have only gotten worse in London, Ontario, Canada. It has been slammed by Oxy addiction and homeless addicts abound in the downtown core.

    Side note: the intervention was filmed at the Sheraton Armoury hotel.

    1. KJ

      Oh that’s terrible 🙁

  14. Sudie

    Any updates on the family itself? I’m still hinky about the dad b/c I’ve seen his parenting style in others, and he’s sacrificing his two younger sons in favor of the older son. I understand why, but I don’t like it. The cognitive dissonance in the situation where everyone in his extended family sees this except for him (and the boys’ grandmother) is staggering. I honestly hope he’s staying strong in the face of it all.

  15. Me

    Met the family some 10 yrs ago great people are doing well

  16. L.K.

    Honestly the father on this episode was infuriating to me. This is one of the worst codependent parents I’ve ever seen on the show. I can’t imagine putting a loved one’s addiction first to such an extent that you completely don’t care about the wellbeing of your two other children. And brainwashing the other two into thinking the situation was normal and fine (the youngest was literally sitting right there while Andrew snorted lines and the dad didn’t care at all) and also into ignoring his own gambling addiction?? I would imagine that they may have resented their father and/or brother as a result of this, but I wonder if he had them so manipulated that they didn’t even think or feel anything remotely negative/critical towards him or their brother. Codependency is a hell of a drug, man. I hope that the help he received in treatment made a difference in his life, because his enabling and manipulative behavior was shocking and toxic as hell.

  17. ANON

    Unpopular opinion but the mother cared more about her kids than the father. He alienated his children from her by making her the only disciplinarian and enabling/befriending his kids to the point of undermining the only responsible adult in their lives. She didn’t abandon her kids she snapped from being gaslit by their father

    1. Ombré Roses

      I have to say- this is literally why I came to this thread. Without more information, I am lead to imply that perhaps she knows how to put in place boundaries.

  18. Andrew Deactis

    HI ALL !!! So it’s been a very long time so nice all this went down and my wife told me I should do an update and to read the comments left behind in this thread . First off thank you very much for all the kind words and thoughts and for being honest about your thoughts . I won’t get into the past on here however I will say I have been living a clean and amazing life ever since the second treatment centre !!!
    Here Is where I’m at now , I got back in touch with my childhood crush from my young church going days and we hit it off like crazy “ complete magic” we now have 3 young healthy beautiful children and are living a free and fun life on our 2 acre hobby farm with 2 horses , beef cattle every other year , chickens, dogs , cats, fish and reptiles hahahaha a very busy lifestyle but we. Love it. I have an amazing career that I strive very hard to be the best at making 6 figures a year now “ beats being homeless eh lmao” we have travelled to Italy which Is where we got engaged and are getting ready to get some rays down south in 3 days . It’s a well needed vacation for us . And as for my family well we are a happy healthy family once again Both brothers are very successful in there lifestyles as well as my mother and father !!!! I don’t think we have all ever been so close to each other on a healthy level as we are now .

    Thank you again for reaching out and keeping my family in your thoughts . Take care .

    1. Dizzy

      Andrew thank you so much for updating us! It’s so great to hear that you’re healthy and happy and that your family is in a good place.

    2. Michelle

      What a wonderful update, Andrew! I am so glad to know that you are all doing better!

    3. Susie

      I just recently watched your episode Andrew, and I have to say I’m so happy to hear that you and your family are doing well! Keep up the great work, thanks for the update.

  19. Kara Bishop

    I had a really hard time watching this. In every episode so far I’ve been so understanding with the addict and with the family, in this case I love the family still even though you know the dad just kicked him out before he got this bad where he had to live in a hotel and they don’t even have food to eat! And if you see my posts I usually say that in some cases I think the family should keep the addict at home because it can save their lives and other things you can look for my posts. But in this case he had two other sons and he needed to protect them not get so bad that they’re in a hotel with out food every day. I’m really mad at the mom for not taking in those two sons! And another thing that really bothered me is why is he doing drugs in the hotel room right in front of his two younger brothers! That is so bad… It is just one way of tempting them to turn to drugs! There is a bathroom in the hotel room, he should have been doing the drugs in the bathroom! I don’t feel sorry for him and I always have so much empathy for the addict. But I just don’t because he didn’t even care enough to do it in the bathroom! I get the feeling that I understand because I know that urge to do opiates is so much stronger but not go in the bathroom! And then he was mad at his brothers for saying that the circumstances that they were in was his fault! I know it was also the drug in the addiction but it was still his fault and to not say that yeah I’m sorry that you know I am sorry that I am a drug addict and I did this to us but to get mad it just really bothered me I feel like he’s just young and selfish! I just really like it when the drug addict may Jill and do other things that being on drugs causes you to do, but they have empathy and they feel bad afterwards and they’re sorry about it! I don’t know if this was just the first one that I really had a hard time feeling empathy for him and understanding him. And I really always feel so understanding even to a fault sometimes. It is just my nature and I don’t really even have to try but with Andrew I had a hard time and I even tried to understand him. Oh and just in case you guys are thinking I don’t understand I’ve been addicted to covet feels and I am now clean almost 10 years… So I completely understand the pull it has on you. But I never would get my family kicked out of her apartment seven times and I can’t remember how long it was but it wasn’t that long. There’s other ways he could have released his anger… I don’t know I’m just assuming that maybe he was doing that to try to get money but his dad didn’t have it… But I don’t know so I’m not saying that this happened at all… And I don’t know enough by watching just an hour of a show… So I do have understanding a sense that I don’t know if this is exactly how it happened. I felt really bad for his dad… I think he was in over his head and he was trying to just do what he thought was best because he loves his sons with every part of him… And I love his brothers! His brothers are so wise and kind and smart! I’m not done watching the episode I’m not even halfway into it I’m on the part where they’re in the hotel… I usually wait till the end of the episode and I read all the comments before I even leave my own comment but I just could not say something. So I don’t even know what’s happening or gonna happen but I will probably post again at the end of the show.

    1. Kara Bishop

      OK so I watched the rest of the episode and during the intervention I changed my opinion on Andrew… And this was before I read Andrews comment it was during the intervention and you could see he cared so much for his brothers and his dad and he really listened and was so engaged in what they had to say (most addicts look down and don’t seem as if they’re even listening) and it just showed a different side of Andrew! And I realized that the addiction was what was speaking and taking control of his life and as well with his dad‘s life the gambling addiction was also taking control of him… So when people were talking bad about the dad you have to remember he has an addiction too… anyways once I read Andrews comment/update it really made me happy relieved, and proud! I was so worried that I was going to read something worse… And I wanted so bad for the family to turn around and just lead a successful and healthy and well they’ve always had love but still love and peaceful life… With only the chaos of raising children and in Andrews case a farm with lots of animals! So glad to hear that both his dad and his mom are living a healthy life… And I just knew his brothers were going to be successful, at first I worried when he was doing the lines in front of his brothers at the hotel but then during the intervention I thought no these are two kids that know that they don’t want to do drugs ever and they really had a good head on their shoulders! Well I’m sending my love and thoughts to you Andrew and the rest of your family, your mom your dad and of course your two brothers and the rest of your family that was at the intervention… They all cared so much about you! God bless you and your family! 😓

  20. Alexis

    So proud of Andrew! I really thought he was going to point fingers but INSTEAD you can tell he wanted to be a better person for his family and 3 months is a HUGE achievement. Hope the best for this dude, and that he never gives up.