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Episode 223: Diana

Season 16, Episode 7

Diana
Age: 29
Location:  Beuna Park, California
Addiction:  Alcohol

What’s Memorable:  Ken knocked this one out of the park. He developed a strategy for getting her to say yes based on what he knew about the family dynamics, and it worked. He knew exactly what she needed to hear. Well done Ken.

Official Synopsis:  In three years, Diana’s alcoholism has gotten so bad that it has led her to being diagnosed with Wernicke-Korsakoff Syndrome, an alcohol-related brain disorder, which recently landed her in the hospital with temporary paralysis and a feeding tube… which she poured vodka into! Diana’s addiction has destroyed her career, her relationships, and now her health. Her parents know that if she doesn’t get help now, she won’t live to celebrate her 30th birthday. Ken Seeley is Diana’s Interventionist.

Date Aired:  Jan 2017
Interventionist:
Ken

Categories: Alcohol, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Ken, Season 16

Discussion

38 Responses to “Episode 223: Diana”

  1. Looking forward to seeing tonight’s episode. Sounds pretty serious. If anyone can help its Ken and the lovely Candy

    Posted by Dewey | January 17, 2017, 4:12 pm
  2. Wow. I am so happy for Diana that she got treatment for herself and that she is still winning the battle with her addiction. Growing up in suburban Orange County I can relate to the feelings of having to be perfect and the anxiety and depression that accompany keeping up such an exhausting facade that everything is wonderful, but I can’t imagine having parents with such a stranglehold. At first I thought it was drunken exaggeration, but her parents were pretty much controlling her to death. Some might fault Ken for his style with this intervention but you can’t argue with the results- it makes me sad that her parents can’t put having a healthy relationship with their daughter in recovery over their pride and having to be “right”. Did anyone else notice or feel sad that Diana didn’t have more people involved in her life and her intervention? It just seemed like her parents were so afraid of people knowing or seeing her that they kept her tucked away. Anyway, I am happy for Diana- and hope her the best in her future.

    Posted by Ally | January 17, 2017, 7:22 pm
  3. Ken was wonderful as always. Good episode. Hope she stays clean

    Posted by Flo | January 17, 2017, 9:55 pm
  4. I am deleting this comment because enough people had a problem with it still being up. For the record I let it be published because I knew the creep was gonna get shit for it and I thought that would be more effective than not posting it all, but I will listen to my commenters and remove. ‘Tis the will of the people. – Dizzy

    Posted by al meeks | January 17, 2017, 11:24 pm
  5. Wow this was a powerful one. I could relate to her being smothered and rebelling. Diana is so beautiful inside and out. Wishing her all the best. And I agree, this might be Ken’s best.

    Posted by Kat R. | January 18, 2017, 6:42 pm
  6. Those parents were beyond controlling. Just that scene of them coming into Diana’s home with food and having done her laundry was crazy. The woman is nearly 30. I found myself wishing that Diana had done something like gone to college in NY or done something to separate herself geographically from her parents; I think it could have helped her enormously.

    Posted by Ruth | January 18, 2017, 7:26 pm
  7. Honestly, this was one of Ken’s best interventions yet. He didn’t leave a single stone unturned…I saw him try to give Diana the empowerment she needed, and he handled the parents flawlessly. I was so happy to see him visit her at treatment during the follow-up. Ken’s awesome 🙂

    Posted by Tazz | January 19, 2017, 12:29 am
  8. Ken really is awesome. So odd to me these girls that have everything going for them and then alcohol destroys it all.

    Posted by Flo | January 19, 2017, 4:13 am
  9. This is yet another example of parents not believing their child when it comes to molestation. In so many cases, it’s so obvious that the need to either protect the accused or to shift blame from themselves is more powerful than the need for them to help the victim.

    I think it happens enough that Dizzy might consider adding it as an addiction trigger. I mean seriously, shouldn’t the benefit of the doubt go to your child and not the abuser? In Diana’s situation, it seems to me that there were some pretty clear indications that her parents knew something was wrong but thought they could fix it. I mean seriously, the controlling and showering of superficial love seems pretty telling.

    This was a very important intervention. I live in Tucson, and while I doubt I will ever run into Diana, I hope she finds peace here. It’s a pretty laid back city and she could make a life here.

    Posted by michilines | January 19, 2017, 8:47 pm
    • “Childhood sexual abuse” is listed as a trigger. There are plenty of addicts out there who were molested as children. Some of the parents believe them, some don’t, and some never know about the molestation until many years later. It’s the actual molestation that is the traumatic event, not how the parents react to it.

      Ken really nailed this one. He called out Diana’s parents on their self-serving behaviour and unwillingness to get help. Diana may be one addict who will have to cut ties with her parents in order to remain in recovery.

      If you run into her at El Guero Canelo say hi for me…

      Posted by Janelle | January 20, 2017, 9:50 am
      • I was specifically referring to the times when parents/families don’t believe them. While I can’t remember the specific names, there have been many instances of childhood sexual abuse where the family had no doubt it had happened and didn’t blame the victim. But is seems to me there a significant number of times when the family doesn’t believe them or even blames them for it (Gina comes to mind).

        I also remember one guy who witnessed his father cheating and the whole family called him a liar.

        That’s what I was thinking about. The psychological impact of being told that something that happened to you either didn’t or was your fault is serious.

        Posted by michilines | January 20, 2017, 4:21 pm
      • As a rape and molestation victim I will tell you you are wrong. The way your family handles it (or doesn’t handle it) can be almost if not as traumatic as the incident itself. My family blamed me (similar to Megan, Gina, and others) and it made things so much worse.

        Posted by Nicole | February 12, 2017, 3:57 pm
  10. am I the only one that feels something amiss happened between Diana and her stepbrother? That could be why her parents were so unwilling to believe that she was molested. I hope that treatment helps this family get to a place where they can love each other in a healthy way.

    Posted by Gloria | January 20, 2017, 10:11 pm
    • I also thought this might have been the case. If he needed to be removed from the home and essentially out of their lives completely there must have been more than sibling bullying happening.

      Posted by Renee Sadie | January 21, 2017, 8:58 am
    • I think there is something to that, because Diana’s mother said something along the lines of “how could he do it, he wasn’t even here.” That makes me think it was the step-brother, with them not realizing it happened before he left. Regardless of who it might of been, I also agree that the notbelieving can be just as traumatic as the assault itself. I am a sexual assault victims advocate and one of our biggest pushes is to “start by believing”- telling someone anything less than I believe you is unacceptable.

      Posted by Ally | January 21, 2017, 9:30 am
      • You are so right. I really pray that her parents come to the realization that she was courageous enough to take the help, now it is their turn.

        Posted by Lisa Miller | January 23, 2017, 10:06 am
    • I think this is it. Notice how the father mentioned her bed-wetting (right around the time he left the house, no less), then immediately changed the topic?

      This episode was like looking into a mirror. Horrific Godspeed to this lady!

      Posted by Artemisia | February 12, 2017, 1:22 pm
  11. amen Ally it is a huge deal when families deny it! It can be MORE harmful than the abuse sometimes especially when the family sticks by the abuser by either denying it or sweeping under the rug.

    Posted by Jennifer | January 21, 2017, 11:22 pm
  12. Diana,

    I am in tears watching your episode. I am so PROUD of you for getting the help that you needed. I pray that you continue to move in the right direction and fall back on the love and support that you have received from both Ken and the Cottonwood staff and counselors. I think this episode hit me so hard because it is ten years ago that we had to bury my aunt from alcoholism. She was such a beautiful person inside and out. I saw so much of her in you. She also had been to Cottonwood but unfortunately did not have the success you did. I will pray for you every day and truly hope that you stay on the road to success. I also pray that your parents will realize that they have a problem that needs to be addressed as well. You had such courage to take that step towards healing, I feel they owe it to you to do the same. You are such a BEAUTIFUL person and I believe you will have such a BRIGHT, HAPPY and FULFILLING future ahead of you. Stay strong. I look forward to seeing your update in a future episode!!!

    Posted by Lisa Miller | January 23, 2017, 10:04 am
  13. You know, I agree with everyone that Ken did a great job in terms of working with Diana and getting her to treatment but in terms of the parents, I did kind of miss Seth. To me, he’s always the one who knows how to speak truth to power when it comes to disbelieving parents who don’t take any responsibility.

    Posted by Ruth | January 28, 2017, 9:53 am
  14. I cant help but wonder if the issue of her brother being abandoned by her father and mother, and her parents showering her with everything they didn’t give him, would result in some very deep underlying conflicts, even is she doesn’t realize it. I didn’t see this addressed at all, how can any parent abandon a child they already have and in essence, just replace him with their daughter?? Can you imagine the pain and abandonment her brother must have felt? Would completely explain his behavior, and then as even more punishment, the parents get rid of him. Disgusting. I know I would have a sense of guilt if I was dealing with this knowledge, thank God I would never be such a bad parent.

    Posted by Em Gill | January 29, 2017, 1:05 pm
    • What? If the brother is the one who molested her (which we don’t even know one way or the other), nothing would explain or excuse it.

      Posted by A.S. | February 8, 2017, 11:14 am
      • I also got the feeling that he was the one that abused her, and it would explain the parents’ (especially the father’s) refusal to believe the claim.

        Posted by BB | May 31, 2017, 8:27 pm
    • I agree, as it is cruel!

      Posted by Johan | September 18, 2017, 10:36 am
    • Whether or not her brother molested her she could still have shame over the way her parents treated him as well as the molestation. I know my brother molested my little brother and my mother showers him with affection and is cruel to my little brother who was victimized. She constantly plays the blame game and one brother (molester) can do know wrong the other brother (victim) can do no right. She is a narcissist and when dealing with narcissism logic is thrown out the window and replaced with drama. My dad falls for her bs all the time but has gotten a little bit better about seeing through the lies and manipulation but enables her behavior to continue. She rules the roost. She places her six children on a totem pole instead of loving them equally. I almost wonder if Diana’s parents showed traits of narcissism by the extreme favoriting and good child vs. bad child role. When I went to my parents about the molestation nothing was done. They took my brother to Olive Garden to “have a chat” and the molesting continued. The coveted golden child could’ve never done such a horrible thing. I was put in trouble for being a bad babysitter and my little bro never got counseling, let alone recognition that he was abused. It’s shocking what will slide under the rug to protect the family name.

      Posted by Nicole | September 18, 2017, 1:46 pm
  15. Hey! Wondering about a few of the episodes that haven’t made it onto this site (Todd as an example!!

    Posted by Alex | January 29, 2017, 4:36 pm
  16. I can’t believe I’m the only to say this. Her parents had some issues, and the molestation wasn’t handled right. But her parents weren’t the worst most controlling by people. They did love her and gave her their best, many kids are smothered and over protected. For God sakes she was killing herself, vitamin deficient, brain disorder and still not eating. If that was your kid wouldn’t you bring her food? How is that controlling. They felt they needed to take care of her because she wasn’t capable of taking care of herself! Out of love. She needs to take some of the blame. Her parents did dote on her, give her every opportunity to succeed. And she wounded up 30 and not able to take care of herself. There’s more than one to blame. It’s just over dramatic. Oh I’m sorry your parents were middle class and over protective. And sent you to college all paid for and trips abroad to italy. Melodrama. It’s sad that the addicts that have never had the chance to be loved by their family. Have been raped by their family members. Tossed out like trash. Those addicts need someone to say I love you and offer that plane trip. And they would most likely be grateful and take the chance for rehab. But why would any tv channel produce and air that? As a recovered addict, I just don’t have much sympathy with the story. Sorry for the rant. I am glad to see another success story! Everyone deserves a second chance. But give her parents a break.

    Posted by Sheena | August 12, 2017, 10:28 am
  17. We’re all different. What could traumatise the one, is a day in the life for the other.. it is more than likely the culmination of events, circumstances and genes that made Diana take the road she did. Another may have given herself/himself over to food.
    The other problem that seems to be ignored, is the damage that was caused to her half-brother. it seems he is blamed for the start of all of the problems in the family. He was only a child but no one seems to care how the new dynamics with a new very selfish stepmother and little sister who got all of the attention had deprived him of happiness too.
    Even his own father blamed him openly on international TV (I am in South Africa) for the problems he caused in the family, and seemed that he was right to send him away. What about his trauma?
    So what is the price for harming the other child (brother), it seems Diana’s well-being/life. They need to fix up and apologise to the brother,.. but might be too late.
    Diana, you would have to move away as far as you can from your parents..possibly for good. They will poison you, interfere at your workplace, relationships etc.. Move closer to your brother..and let him talk to you about his pain.. once you truly understand it.. you will hopefully be able to free yourself of the curse on you, which may haunt you to the end.
    Keep in mind that your mother too is in dire need of help, but she is old enough to realise it herself. She may have to be molested. Your father seems to make out as if he is the man, but in my eyes, he is the biggest coward. He needs to fix up his relationship with his son, apologise profusely and possibly the son’s mother too.
    I wish you good luck Diana, you need a change of scenery, a good man and some children as they will keep your mind occupied and away from all of your daunting thoughts.

    I talk of experience. My best friend passed away on the 11th of September 2017, where the alcohol and lifestyle she used to escape her same problems as your, finally killed her. (Check at 1:48 where her mother sits behind her, and watch her every move like an eagle).

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B8sFSvK3nWpWMi1Dald6dEM1dUU/view?usp=sharing

    Posted by Johan | September 17, 2017, 9:40 pm

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