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Episode 48: Pam

Season 3, Episode 13


Age: 49
Location: Unsure
Addiction: Alcohol
What’s memorable: How needy and depressed and downright annoying she gets when she’s drunk, the childhood abuse that still haunts her everyday and that she is obviously self-medicating to deal with.

Official Synopsis: Pam is a 49-year-old alcoholic who has suffered a string of abusive, failed marriages and horrific molestation as a child. Drinking is her only way to cope. Her frightened family has already lost one sibling to cirrhosis of the liver. Their greatest fear is that Pam will fall to the same fate unless an intervention can save her life.

Original Air Date: August 2007
Interventionist: Candy

Categories: Abusive Relationship, Alcohol, Candy, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Death of Loved One, Most Powerful Episodes, Season 3


25 Responses to “Episode 48: Pam”

  1. Follow up info on Pam:

    Pam accepted treatment and became sober as of July 2007. One of Pam’s nieces posted on the Intervention forum on televisionwithoutpity.com in July 2008 and said that Pam was approaching one year sober and is now engaged to marry Marvin.

    Also, there is a follow up video here:

    We all wish you good luck and success on your road to recovery, Pam!

    Posted by Voltaria | February 17, 2015, 6:13 pm
  2. I bet Pam is a wonderful and insightful person under all that alcohol. Good job getting sober and living a happy life! You are worth it!!

    Posted by Sarah Thomas | May 8, 2015, 5:53 pm
  3. Pam is from Arizona, btw. Also, I could relate to her story so much about being raped and no one believing me. Idk how she lasted so long because I’m still in pain from it 7 years later. I do the same thing with guys where I need them but push them away and then feel disgusted with how needy and mean I can be. I feel like she went through so much and if she can make it through to the other side then maybe I can too. Although I’m on methadone for my heroin addiction all the other stuff like obsessing about the rape is still there. Just taking away the drugs or alcohol is not enough. Does anyone know how she is doing today? I would really like to speak with her. Does anyone know how to contact her?

    Posted by Nicole | January 9, 2016, 4:54 am
    • There was a brief follow up in tonight’s episode. She looked great and is a substitute school nurse.

      Posted by Courtney | July 31, 2016, 11:46 pm
    • I am Pam’s sister, April. I am on her Intervention. A lot has happened since the show. As far as I know she is still sober. In August of this year, her son, my nephew Richard was murdered. In 2011, our mother passed. Pam is no longer married to Marvin. Pam is on FB as Ann Ruelas.

      Posted by April | December 4, 2016, 1:04 am
      • I’m so sorry April. I hope you’re doing well and the rest of the family. I’m so sad to hear the news about Richard. I wish it weren’t so.

        Posted by Amy | October 14, 2017, 1:39 am
      • I just watched her episode today for the 2nd time. I’m so sorry to hear about Richard and your Mom!!! Is She still sober??? Is her name Pam or Ann? I hope your family is doing well.

        Posted by Chrissy | March 10, 2018, 7:26 pm
      • I am so sorry to hear about your nephew and Mother. .. and I’m sorry for whatever happened within the family…I only say that because u wrote ‘as far as I know, she’s sober’. You were very good to her from what I saw on the show…take care and God bless you all

        Posted by Amy Lawson | September 27, 2019, 12:06 am
  4. Are you still with marvin

    Posted by Lorna | August 9, 2016, 11:29 am
  5. I am a relative of Pam. A horrible tragedy happened in August. Her son, Richard who was in the show was killed. A sensless tragedy. Our family has immense sadness, and of course shock. He had 3 kids.

    Posted by Tia April | October 22, 2016, 4:03 am
  6. Pam seems like a beautiful soul under all that drinking. She has been through so much even these past few years with her and Marvin no longer together, her mom and son dying, I know she probably has a lot of hurt. Losing a child is the worst thing ever. I hope she is able to maintain her sobriety because no matter how bad things get relapsing only makes things harder.

    Posted by Andy | August 30, 2017, 11:52 pm
  7. Pam, you have such a beautiful, sweet soul. Please never give up on yourself!!! There is always light in the darkness

    Posted by sarah | September 14, 2018, 5:33 pm
  8. Pam.. this may never reach you personally, but just know that your story touched me deeply. My sister is an alcoholic who lives with me. Seeing your recovery has been inspirational to say the least. I am so saddened to hear the news of your precious mijo’s passing. Live the healthiest and happiest life you know how, in his memory.

    Posted by Ashley | December 16, 2018, 5:55 pm
  9. i’m surprised no one mentioned how awful the mother was! who doesn’t believe their own daughter when she says she was sexually assaulted??! one of her other daughters was even raped by the same man! sometimes the interventionist confronts the guilty party, forces them to admit their wrongdoing, and has them apologize; why didn’t candy do that here? those were clearly still huge unresolved issues for pam, both of the sexual assaults, as well as her mother’s refusal to believe her and support her. i think she needed to hear that, to hear her mom say, “i’m sorry for not believing you and supporting you when it happened. but i’m here for you now and i love you.”.

    Posted by Brooke | July 24, 2019, 9:17 pm
    • her most recent fb is: https://www.facebook.com/pamela.renteria.7161

      Posted by Brooke | July 24, 2019, 9:21 pm
    • Well I only haven’t because her mom has since passed and I don’t believe in talking ill of the dead. Although at the end of the intervention right before she leaves for treatment she gives everyone hugs and she says “I need you to believe me mom” and she says “I will” and they hug and cry.

      Posted by Andy | July 25, 2019, 5:24 am
      • I am the sister of Pam, April. I wrote into the show and was so happy that her story was chosen. I am so devastated, and angry at some of the comments on here. Our mother made some bad choices, but.she is still our mom. She was very unhappy, depressed, angry….she never sought.out the help she so desperately needed and Pam and I are pretty sure. that she suffered a lot of abuse, both physically and mentally., she rarely ever talked about her past. Any type.of abuse when she was young, was never to be spoke of. Pam is doing good, 12yrs sober. When her son Richard was murdered, everyone thought that she would go back to drinking. That didn’t happen. I seriously just wish the dang negative comments could be kept at bay. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if it’s that negative kind of keep it to yourself. I know if my sister Pam read all this stuff pretty pissed off okay got to go and appreciate the positive comments you’ll have to excuse any of the typos I have really bad neuropathy in my fingers

        Posted by April Urbanos | July 28, 2019, 11:18 am
        • Hi April. I’m sorry if any of my post have offended or angered you. I’m glad to hear that Pam is still sober all these years later. She has gone through so much before and after the show. I’m sorry to hear about your nephew Richard! Your sister is a very strong person. I know many people that would not have made it as long as she has with everything this world has thrown at her.

          Posted by Andy | July 30, 2019, 7:07 am
  10. No need to be sorry Andy. I need tougher skin. There is No way to not NOT see negative comments. It really isn’t up to me. Pam and I don’t talk much anymore, there’s just been so much tragedy in this family, some just too awful to say. there isn’t really a family anymore. I saw Pam last in the 3 yr anniversary of Richards death.

    Posted by April Urbanos | September 5, 2019, 12:00 am
    • Hi April, Just wanted to say how sorry to hear about all the tragedy your family has and is going through. I remember this episode very well and it touched me dearly. I pray that you and your family may find strength and be able to heal so you can get back together. Big hugs to you and your family.

      I’m sorry to hear about your nephew. I don’t want to offend you by any means so you don’t need to answer but I was wondering what happened to him? I remember him on the episode and am so sad to hear this. Peace to you and your family.

      Posted by Kitty Katt | September 7, 2019, 8:27 pm
      • He was murdered. The hells angels took his life. Unfortunately, Richard was in the Mongols which the 2 biker clubs are to shoot each other upon site. SENSELESS I’m afraid the peace won’t touch this family, sad but no one knows how to deal with everything that has happened….

        Posted by April Urbanos | September 7, 2019, 9:15 pm
        • I’m so sorry April. I will pray for you and your family.

          Thank you for responding.

          Posted by Kitty Katt | September 7, 2019, 10:34 pm
  11. Of course. Thank you

    Posted by April Urbanos | September 7, 2019, 11:12 pm
  12. Pam is an amazing woman to stay sober through the death of a child. God bless her, and all of you.

    Posted by Anonymous | September 11, 2019, 3:11 am
  13. She has relapsed. Just didn’t want to say so

    Posted by ARU | September 11, 2019, 3:46 am

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