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Season 6 Episode


Age: 20’s
Location: Portland, Oregon
Addicted to: Heroin, cocaine
What’s Memorable: Abandoned Indian street kid adopted by a white Christian-American couple who seem to think that saving a poor brown boy is doing right by God and that all their kids should live wholly by the Word. The dad is infuriating in his inability to connect with Gabe on any meaningful level due to his religious beliefs. Gabe seems like a genuinely good person in a family that just doesn’t understand him.

Official synopsis:  When he was three, Gabe’s mother abandoned him on the streets of Calcutta, but he was adopted by a young American couple. Gabe seemed happy in America, but he secretly felt like an outsider. In high school he started to rebel and resent his Christian upbringing. He began using marijuana and cocaine, and later graduated to heroin. Then he squandered all of the $37,500 he received after a car accident to support his drug habit. Now the family fears that without an intervention, Gabe’s addiction and depression will soon lead to his death.

Original Air Date: May 2009
Interventionist: Candy

All comments.

  1. Anna

    So how is Gabe doing? Was he successful in his choosing to give up the drugs?

    1. Intervention Directory

      They re-ran his episode the other night and it looks like he’s relapsed a few times but has been clean and sober since March 2009. Yay Gabe!

      1. Manish

        I saw the episode today.(in Holland) I’m from Indian heritage myself. I also had an Christian upbringing, which in comparison made sense to me, by the way. If i’m down i always ask my self what would have happened to me if i stayed in the motherland. I probably would not be alive.. Gabe had an impact on me. We all deserve a decent life….. I hope he’s doing well…

  2. s hutch

    Gabe – I searched the web and came across this site. If you happen to read this, I can identify with how you feel in pics..I’m adopted as well. You have a good sense of peace within you as the show alluded to..stay strong and it was inspiring to see you continue to value your family through feeling different

  3. Alexa Morales

    I was wondering how gabe is doing. I seen the rerun episode of his and that I was wonderinghow he is doing I have been having a tough time to stay on track without slipping to my old ways if you can help in some way that would be nice thank you and for gabe you helped me through my time in need

  4. Amanda

    Alexa I’m not sure if I can help much. I have never used intravenously but I have had plenty of crushed powder up my nose. My boyfriend who I met when he got out of jail used most of his adult life. He promised me when we met he would never use again but I am sure you can guess how that turned out. He has been on methadone for the past 3 years but has still used on and off. As of right now he is doing well. We found out about 7 months ago he is HI positive. He has been for some time now. He had been tested in the past but it didn’t show. I am negative as of right now but will continue testing . What I wish they would address on the show is the biological affect of opiate use. The withdraw comes from the chemicals in your brain trying to over compensate for the lack of opiates the drug provides. Which our body natural produces when we take the drug we flood the brain will feel goods then when they aren’t there anymore the body doesn’t like it. Which will also make us feel more depressed so regardless of what the addiction was it IS now a sickness. You will know when you are ready you will need a detox drug and you will likely test that drug by using with it. Some people have a longer path than others. The biggest advice I can offer is get away from every person you call friend. Those you use with or buy drugs with. They are not your friends. Even when you get sober you can’t go back to associating with them. You also need to find the root of what triggers you to use. When we fix our mind we can fix our bodies. Good Luck I will pray for you to find a way to be strong enough to take that step.

  5. Jennifer

    Man I really liked this guy.. he’s a big hearted guy who’s emotionally lost & longing. (Not to mention seriously handsome!) I pray he’s happy, well, clean & sober. Neat individual. Take care Gabe

  6. Jacquie

    I think the gabe v story effected me more than any of the others. I check the Internet regularly for updates and never really find them. Gabes beautiful spirit shines through the ugliness of addiction and so does his intense inner turmoil. You just wish so bad you could figure it out and fix it for him. ( you if u ever read this gabe) I think to say the parents think bringing them into the family as one of their own is because they think it’s their ticket to heaven is extremely unfair. I am native American and poverty is real. To provide a child in desperate need with a home and true love is clearly in this case a choice of love. Does the dad have a problem connecting? Is he a little harsh? Yes but that’s not uncommon in dads. Communication is not a mans thing. I hope gabe gets intense therapy in addition to clinging to the faith he was raised with because it’s the only way to untie all the emotional knots tied up inside. Embrace yourself because no doubt your an awesome person, embrace healing and staying clean and it might help you to look into your birth culture with pride not pain. Find the beauty in it rather than the pain and uglyness of being left. You were chosen and they all obviously love you as if blood even through your lows so u are blood. I know this will be hard my prayers are with you.

    1. Stefan

      The dad was blinded by religious indoctrination, plain and simple. It prevented him from fully seeing what his son needed to get better, which is something we see all too often on this show. As far as communication not being a “man”s thing, I’m so glad that my generation is rectifying that. It’s been the cause of so many ills in our society.

      1. kelly

        I agree that the insipid judgemental aspect of christianity is the crux of his issues.
        There is a swedish method of intervention that doesn’t involve a higher power.
        HIs parents most important relationship being Christ says it all.
        Gab needs support in trusting his your intuition and he needs recognition that his thoughts regarding God are valid and not deny his intelligence.
        The irony is that, as he says.. his dad is floating on a religious cloud just as he’s trying to find his own cloud.
        Gab is worthy just because if he take Christ into his life.
        I know his dad and moms intentions are good because they are brainwashed themselves .
        I think he needs to be freed from the heavy expectation of him ‘living a christian life.

  7. Foff

    Wow, Dizzy. Can’t you just share Gabe’s story without throwing in your hatred? Who cares why his parents adopted him. It’s really not your business or concern, and it ended up better than what his life would have been like.

    1. Mallory

      Hey “Foff”… Pretty sure that’s why she includes the “official synopsis” section. The “what’s memorable” is where she shares her opinion.

    2. Stefan

      Um, the mom explicitly said that “God” told them to adopt a child from India, so it’s clear what their underlying motives were, at least at the beginning.

    3. Taryn

      You have absolutely no idea if his life would have ended up worse in India. The fact is, adoption is trauma and white savorism is real. A white couple had no right to tell this boy that if he didn’t live by Christianity that he would be unhappy. Disgusting behavior, and horrible comment.

  8. Lynn

    I kinda had a cruah on Gabe. He has the potential to be so amazing once he gets sober. He is one of those contagious personalities that you hust want to be around. I hope he’s happy.

    1. Moriah

      He was super hot. He if he was that awesome while using just imagine who he could become while sober. I think about this episode and where he is now often. Wish him all the best.

  9. Pandora

    He really seemed to do whatever was in his power to make sure he ended as he should have, in his mind, in the first place; on the streets. Also, he did whatever he could to distance himself from his family; be the addict, be the one that nobody understands, be the one that doesn’t live as a Christian; visibly be different, as he felt different from them on the inside.

    I really hope he finally accepted that this family really loved him as one of their own, with their limits, such as in any family, and I hope he doesn’t feel so out of place now.

    1. Lani

      Did you get the answer to your question? It seems that he has not been successful and rather basically become a career criminal in order to support drug addictions, which is sad.

  10. Jordyne

    I thought this one was pretty sad, but it did leave me feeling hopeful for Gabe. His addiction was so severe, and you could see how it was just running him ragged. I feel for his alienation, but Candy did a fantastic job with the parents in this episode, trying to help them see that this didn’t have anything to do with religion at all, it’s psychology, it’s human emotion, and there’s more to life than following the word of God. You could tell the Dad just didn’t get it still, but it seemed hopeful for the rest of the family. They were obviously generous, good-hearted people, but really lacking in perspective. Gabe on the other hand, was a little frustrating to watch because he was so aware of the gifts and chances he’d been given, but couldn’t accept them as positives in his life. But he didn’t argue, he didn’t put up a fuss. He just went to treatment, and I sincerely hope he found his way. Seemed like a good guy, someone you’d just naturally want to be friends with.

  11. Fer

    I wonder how Gabe is doing now. I hope he is ok.

      1. Laura

        Dont see what’s so funny about this? What’s with the “lol” comment. Ypu must be pretty sadistic to gain pleasure from his suffering.
        On another note, it saddens me to see he was arrested recently, like a week ago. I really was holing he had made it out the other side of addiction

      2. Honey

        Wow how many arrests he’s had and how unhealthy he looks now.. so so sad…

      3. Valerie

        Gabe, I know you posted this. You use lol bc if you don’t laugh you’ll cry. You weren’t meant for this. I wish you could see yourself like I do. Please get help. Think of all the lives you can save.

      4. Danny

        I’ve never seen so many mugshots before! Three massive pages of them. Very sad, but as long as he is alive there is always hope he can get better. Poor guy.

  12. Ida Thompson

    He has been arrested about 15 times. How awful! About ten times arrested since this episode aired. Looks like he is now a meth addict. Very sad

    1. Luke

      I just say the episode on Oct 02 2020. When I saw the ending that hes been clean since 2009. It gave me hope but then I went to search for updates and fell on this page. I am sadden to read and see this. I cant believe hes been arrested that often. How does he bail out of jail everytime? If hes on heroin and goes to jail that often then he should be getting crazy withdraws everytime. I would not wish that on my worse enemy. I really wish the best for Gabe. At this point what can we do to help? He doesnt really wanna quit it seems. I am in the same boat its 50/50 love hate relationship daily.

      1. Kitty Katt

        He probably sits in jail while waiting for his trial which from what I see, he’s done time in the prisons.
        Also, you can practically find any drug you want in prison and very easily, if you want.

  13. Gg

    Gabe was arrested again on February 5, 2020 with a $20,000 bond. He looked so good in treatment on his follow-up, I really thought he could make it.

  14. Another Asian Adoptee

    I saw this episode close to when it came out, when I was about 23. Rewatching this now, at 31, I can see a whole new layer of everything. I was also adopted from Asia into a white family in a primarily white community, and there aren’t words to describe the trauma that that causes. I get the sense from Gabe’s family that they are very loving, especially his sisters, but unfortunately, even the most loving people can’t understand what it is like to be a person of color in the U.S. and especially what it’s like to be a person of color adopted into a white family in a majority white community. And even me and other transnational/transracial adoptees can’t fully put it into words. So I understand the disconnection that Gabe feels from his family and his community. Those are wounds that leave deep scars.

    What I find really tragic about this episode is his father’s attitude. Even during the intervention, when Candy informs the family that Gabe is sick, the father comments that he isn’t convinced because there are all sorts of things that are called sickness but are really just sin. The fact that his father doesn’t understand the biological reality of addiction clearly has an effect on how he perceives Gabe’s behaviors, and it’s no wonder that Gabe has no interest in his father’s religious beliefs and feels so distant from his father. Honestly, I feel like if his father weren’t part of the picture, if it were just his mom and his siblings, it would be so much easier for Gabe to recover and begin healing. But the father’s attitude is a huge roadblock in that journey in my opinion.

    I can’t imagine what his life must have been like, especially with that father. I hope Gabe eventually finds the help and support he needs, and I hope he can eventually find some peace about his identity and where he fits into this world.

    1. Stefan

      Indeed the dad was a piece of shit. The mom did really seem to come around and understand the situation. My best friend and his sister were adopted from South Korea by white parents and it has definitely caused him some anguish. I’ve long wanted him to watch this episode because I believe he could really relate to Gabe.

  15. WB

    Looks like from at least starting at(that I saw) he’s been doing meth since 30-34 and it’s been some hard years! tons of arrests, lots of burglary charges besides Possession of meth. I’ve always thought, recovering from nearly every other concoction: meth seems to be the most criminally-producing (as in creates an uptick compared to any other drug per case of addiction with an even amount of users of both) Based on what I’ve seen, and studies.

    1. Cheyenne Pinney

      I really wanna talk to him im also from portland and though i wasnt adopted i can really relate to him. I just watched the episode about his addiction and such on intervention. I come from a religous family(jehovah witnesses) and know how his dad came off was really really sad because my family did to. Im also a addict I’ve been clean two years and i feel we could talk and learn from one another. Though i am a meth addict life gets to us and we struggle i hope he sees this and can get in touch. I also hope he is doing well still and soing amazing in his recovery

      1. kelly

        I should have proofread my comment .. sorry
        for grammatical errors in the above post.

        The dads intervention spiel was abysmal !!! Complete judgement, threats and guilt. The ultimate threat if he doesn’t bow to authority.

        It’s not going to work unless they release them from the weight of religious guilt

        Hey dad you dont listen.. at all.

        He wants control because he has zero in his religious family.

  16. Corcerned in Canada

    Can’t we find a way to help this guy? What he needs is psychotherapy. Nobody knows what happened to him in his formative years (0-3) it could have been horrific, and unless dealt with can destroy a life, as it has Gabes. The worst thing that could have happened to him was to be placed in this home oozing with white privelege. There was absolutely no effort to get to the root of the problem. Accept god and you will get better? WTAF? Poor kid. An rejecting him at 18 and throwing him out smh. Poor guy. You can tell he has a deeper understanding of life, but is never given the opportunity to discover it.

    1. Jessica

      You are right.

  17. sixxysix

    I’m not going to even touch on the dad and his wrongdoings, as they are obvious and frustrating. It’s his mom who really amazed me. She genuinely took to heart candy’s words. She was so, so so sweet to Gabe during the intervention. Her true love for him was palpable. I think ONE thing his dad said had merit, that Gabe had/has a permanent victim complex. Many with far less support and far more f*cked up stories recover. I know better than to compare trauma, but it’s frustrating seeing how he hurts his family. Really sucks seeing his recent and continued arrests. I’m sad for his mom and sisters especially.

  18. Maz

    Some people don’t want help. Not everyone can be cured, he’s on a downward spiral and destructive behaviour will cause his death. He is obviously suicidal and doing it the slow way. My brother was the same, we tried to support him, but he said he wanted to enjoy his death. He lost everything as his wife left him and took the kids, so he turned to drugs, it was a relief when he was gone, as much as it breaks my heart, he’s not suffering anymore, and neither is the family.

    Some people cannot be helped, his family must be going through hell.

  19. Darran

    That family drove that boy away and into drugs…. and all because of religion. Christopher Hitchens was right when he said “religion poisons everything”.
    That husband wife should hang their head in shame. Totally disgusting.

  20. Kim Williams

    Hey Gabe if you are reading all this shit that people write about you…..who the actual fuck are these people ??
    Go outside ….look up at the sky…and go to a meeting.

    That’s all I have to say. My name is Kim….Kimbo hugs ❤️

  21. Fabia

    You can all put the blame on his dad, his mother. Turns out he was the only addicted son in the family, so I don’t think his dad Christianity is the problem here. The boy got into this by himself blaming everyone that was there for him from the beggining and ignoring their suffering.He got the chance for the intervention and got clean for a fair time but then decided to go back to that again and never got out, he’s still on drugs and crimes. Now blaming his dad and moms beliefs is stupidity!

    1. LK

      This comment strikes me as IMMENSELY ignorant. Sure he was the only addict child in his family (as far as we know, mind you), but he was also the only transracial and transcultural adoptee in his family. If you don’t understand how adoption can cause trauma, let alone transracial/transcultural adoption, then I really don’t know what to tell you. Not to mention how devastating and severe religious trauma can be, good god! Uh yes, your parents and siblings choosing to pursue a belief system that objectively denies the biological reality of addiction being a physical and mental problem and calling it “sin” instead affects people, holy shit. I get the vibe that you’ve never had an addiction if you see it as “his choice” to “go back”, as opposed to an overwhelming biological/mental compulsion. Yes Gabe has personal responsibility, but it’s not as if choosing addiction is “easy”. It actually totally sucks to be an addict, but it’s an urge people fight every day with all-consuming severity. You should keep your ignorant, close minded thoughts to yourself.

      1. Kate

        THIS! 100% this! Nice to see there are people out there who understand this! The way his “father” and mother treated him was horrendous. Last night I visited there profiles on Facebook and it looks like they just moved on and left no trace of Gabe.

  22. Bee

    Wow, this episode made me so uncomfortable. His parents may have meant well when they adopted him but their whole attitude of “saving the poor abandoned kid from street life” denied him of being able to build a sense of pride in his own identity, not to mention divorced him from his cultural heritage. And the whole “we prayed for a little Indian boy and God gave him to us”, as if he was an item ordered off Amazon or something. Imagine growing up with such a heavy burden on your shoulders of having to feel grateful to the people who “saved” you. No wonder his self esteem was rock bottom. The whole episode was so disappointing, although some of his family genuinely seem like good people.

    1. L

      Spot on! I just watched his episode now. Seems like he needed counselling before using drugs

    2. Jessica

      You are right.

    3. Xlio

      I agree completely.

    4. LK

      This comment perfectly encapsulated my feelings on this episode.

  23. Jessica

    I just saw the episode with Gabe and couldn’t believe my eyes. I come from Germany and found my ex boyfriend dead in 2010. he died of a febtanyl overdose. he was only 30 years old. the two are so similar. Exactly the same clothing style: t shirt over sweater, jeans in the same style with a belt and always a little too low, the same haircut and color, the same skin tone, the same sweet chubby cheeks and teddy bear belly ….. etc.I hope so much that he is clean and satisfied and that his wounds are healed. I don’t think Tommy would have made it anymore. I’m still in the substitution program and can’t quite get off the needle. for 16 years. … Tommy was my first real love! i still love him. I know we are immortal souls and will see each other again.

    1. Courtney

      Damn I live in Portland and know the area he was stealing in. He’s escalated so much, it’s so sad.

      1. Stefan

        Wow no kidding. Sadly I predict very soon he will end up in jail long-term or dead.

    2. Kitty Katt

      I saw that when I went to google his name after seeing this first:
      My mouth dropped open seeing 32 mugshots and arrests.
      It only goes up until May 2020 so the link you shared isn’t even included in his arrest records.

  24. Melissity

    I didn’t realize Gabe was from Portland, Oregon. I live in the county south of there and it looks like he has an open case in that county that was initiated in 2019. Several FTAs since then (failure to appear). Last date on record for the case was December 2020. He also has a laundry list of felony charges prior. So sad. Unfortunately heroin is big in Portland and the surrounding suburbs of Clackamas county.

    1. Melissity

      I stand corrected: he has SEVERAL open cases in multiple counties including the case Robin posted about above. No shows to all hearings in those cases. So sad! If you want to see his past and current cases, click here:
      Search Vogel, Gabriel

      1. Kitty Katt

        Your link isn’t working for me. Is it working for you now if you try? Just wondering if it’s just my problem why I don’t see what you’re saying.

  25. Anon

    I’ve never wanted to fight a total stranger so much in my life. The dad…wow just wow. Way to completely miss the point of the intervention. Candy straight up told him that his judgmental nonsense was a trigger for Gabe to use, a reminder of his failures. So what did this idiot do? He doubled down on stupidity and went all in with the judgment and religious high handedness. Unbelievable.

    1. Bob

      Yeah I agree with you but to give him some credit he might not know any better. Possibly in his mind hes thinking he has to be the strong man and set the kid straight type of thing eg “It ends now no more nonsense”. He doesnt understand addiction =/

  26. Bob

    Yeah adults with imaginary friends that believe in magic books are so out of touch of reality. Has nothing to do with sin or other nonsense… its chemicals and trauma. So much going on with the brain of an addict maybe the father would understand better if didnt waste his time reading fairtales. Happy Gabe got chance to get help from professionals. Religious idiots grow up its pathetic…

  27. Amanda McKnight

    Hey my name is Amanda, I actually was in rehab when Gabe came in with a tv crew
    I had to sign a waiver. I had the privilege of meeting Gabe at Pat Moore foundation. It is now 2021 and I was wondering about him. Does anyone know if he is still alive or sober or just whatever. I would love to contact him and say hi. I hope you are doing well and you probably won’t remember me. We were in detox. Stay safe spirit friend. Namaste Amanda Renee

    1. Jessica

      As of a few days ago he was incarcerated on Clark county jail in Washington state. My bf was incarcerated with him. I mentioned Don the phone that I was watching intervention and he said a guy in there was on it and then asked him what season he was was on and he told him. I haven’t watched it, I’ve learned the hard way that addicts just don’t go to treatment and get miraculously better. I’m not an addict or a user, but my bf is and he’s been to treatment 3 times now and he was just transferred to prison yesterday from county jail, for charges he got on one of his relapses. I’m hoping this will be the thing that finally changes his path. He’s doing a prison base drug treatment with 2 yrs of treatment/rehabilitation after he’s released. Hopefully Gabe will get help and stick with it. Our overdose rate here is insane. Hoping for the best.

  28. Janel

    I just rewatched this episode, and realized why I hadn’t rewatched it earlier. I had a hard time with Gabe, I hope for the best for him, but I just did not like him. Had a real hard time with his “poor me” attitude. Before anyone yells at me, this is just my opinion, not fact.

  29. Sarah

    Gabe is the addict who has probably had the greatest emotional effect on me from the show. I don’t know him personally so I have no idea whether he is a good or bad person. He could be a terrible person for all I know. But the trauma he experienced as a transracial and transcultural adoptee breaks my heart. I’m so glad that the stories and voices of transracial adoptees, as well as those who experienced religious trauma, are beginning to be uplifted and heard. The assumption that children are better off in America with a white family rather than their home country is not always correct. Hopefully more children growing up in these situations know that they’re not alone and their struggles are real.

    1. Gigi

      I completely agree with you. Poverty in and of itself is not traumatizing but a pervasive lack of belonging certainly is. That said if memory serves Gabe was literally abandoned on the streets of Calcutta so there’s no question that his life in the US was an improvement. It’s interesting to ponder how his life might have been different if he was raised in a more diverse area…

  30. Gretchen

    I’m watching this episode now and feel so sorry for Gabe. I can identify with not being understood and only being preached at. That Father is really out of touch with reality. You can be a Christian and not be an asshole. There is no love in being judgemental. The father’s self-righteous arrogance is sickening.

    Thank you for your great description under “What’s Memorable,” Dizzy. Perfectly said.

  31. Stevie sharp

    I’m proud of you gabe

    1. India

      We love you!

  32. sarah venr

    Gabe’s parents are so so so so gross. “Reject their love and authority” like they’re the same thing, the mental issues and savior complex both parents have to think that a voice told them to “adopt a little Indian boy”, the ignorance on how their child would be seen, feel, and interact with the world – they should have never made it through the adoption process. So many people could have caught this before it happened. Maybe he would have made it if his parents had tried parenting years ago instead of chucking their kid into a church every time they didn’t know what to do, but he’ll never know. He honestly never had a chance with these people.

  33. Kara Bishop

    I believe that a lot of his trauma not only comes from being a trans racial and transcultural adoptive, but also from the trauma of being a abandoned by his mother… That must create an immense amount of pain. Someone commented on here that you don’t know what happened during his formative years when he was with his mother. I have a degree in child development and those are critical years to a child’s emotional development. I really wish him well, but I know that you can’t get clean until you’re ready to get clean. I am clean off meth 18 years and clean off opiates almost 10 years. I really hope that someday Gabe can be at peace and find happiness and love! ❤️

  34. Kara Bishop

    He’s in Clackamas county jail. He was arrested in October when the office manager of apartments called the police about a suspicious vehicle. When the police were there to check he was sleeping in a stolen vehicle and they found meth and heroin on him and 70 stolen apartment rent checks. It really saddens me that right now he’s in jail but hopefully they send him to a drug treatment center for at least a year, after he does his time in jail. But like I said if he doesn’t want to get clean that’s not going to always help him until he wants to. But sometimes when you’re clean in a treatment facility, you might decide then that you want to stay clean. Again my thoughts are with Gabe…

    1. Kara Bishop

      Sorry that was in 2020 that he stole the rent checks… But he is in Clackamas County Jail since October 2022 for 4 failure to appears.

      1. kitty katt

        Looks like he had A LOT of arrests on 2020 and then some.

        Here’s a link to all of them:

      2. kitty katt

        Go to the link below and enter Gabriel Vogel and click Oregon. You’ll see them all.

  35. Katie

    I think it’s just too easy and really quite juvenile in my opinion to heap all kinds of judgement and blame on the dad and the family for being religious and white. They seemed to me like basically decent people who did the best they could with what they know. So his parents are so bad for adopting a brown child and essentially “doing it wrong,” in your opinion? Grow up. There was clearly a lot of love there. And clearly a lot of real issues that needed to be dealt with and overcome as well. The intervention though wow! To Candy goes the glory! She’s the best. So sad to read that things have continued to be so bad for Gabe. Gabe, if you ever read this, it’s never too late and I believe in you.

    1. kitty katt

      I agree!

    2. Stefan

      The dad was the only one who bothered me, and it wasn’t for being white and religious. It was because he didn’t even try to connect with Gabe other than through blame.

    3. Dahlia

      Definitely agree with this. I think it’s so easy these days to just resort to the “white savior complex” criticisms, but that really didn’t seem to be the case here. Parents were not perfect, dad definitely wasn’t the most mindful, but as you said they did their best with Gabe and it does seem unfair to blame them for how Gabe ultimately turned out, there were many other factors at play.

      1. Stefan

        Religious extremism and shame definitely didn’t help.

    4. Esh

      …Gabe explicitly described how his adopted family’s overt and covert racist behavior towards him left him feeling othered and dehumanized. That’s what’s known as racial trauma, and it’s a big piece of his story. You’re choosing not to listen to it.

      1. Stefan

        Exactly. I don’t know why so many (regular) commenters on here don’t seem to understand. It’s also big reason as to why it’s highly recommended that if people choose to adopt transracially then they should adopt two of the same race together so they don’t feel as alienated.

  36. DKB

    For reasons unknown, I constantly think about Gabe and his struggle.
    I’ve seen his record/mug shots, and just see such a progression in the disease over the last years.
    To think he has succumbed to this for so long .. he must be in such pain.
    I wish he had been able to overcome whatever demons possess him, and move forward in the life he deserves.
    Wishing you well Gabe. Hope you find peace.

  37. K

    As a transracial adoptee and the only person of color in my family my heart ached watching this episode. I grew up in a town that wasn’t very diverse and always felt singled out–people would stop my dad in the store when I was with him as a child and question him about whether I was really his kid. Sometimes people would stare at us in restaurants… in school I always got questions about why I looked different, who my “real” parents were etc. Even outright racism. I really related to what Gabe described. Many people don’t understand that it’s a huge part of your identity and people around you never let you forget that you’re different. I could easily see how I could have struggled the way Gabe struggled. I was very fortunate to go to university and learn more about the country I came from, meet other adoptees and attend counseling. I’m not religious but Gabe is in my thoughts and I wish him nothing but the best. I wish his family could have done more to help him connect with his culture, introduce him to other adoptees, get him counseling instead of sending him off to that religious school. Unfortunately, narratives like “you should feel grateful we adopted you” and “we don’t see color,” while well intentioned, are actually not at all helpful. I am sad to see Gabe is still struggling and I hope he knows he deserves love, that he’s not alone in that struggle.

  38. Aj

    The guy needs to go back to India and re identify with his original culture. Be imensed it. No more religious bullshit. Just Indian desi culture. And once he does. He will learn how to value life. Than come back to the states with your Indian and American values and be a part of something

    1. Stefan

      Agreed. My best friend and his sister were both adopted from South Korea, and while his parents were very religious (at least his mom), they never erased their Korean heritage, even making his middle name what his birth/adoptive name was, and also taking them back to where they were born.

  39. Danny

    I’ve never seen so many mugshots before! Very sad, but as long as he is alive there is always hope he can get better. Poor guy.

    1. Ed

      Are there any new updates on Gabe? The last ones appear to be in 2020. His Facebook page says he received his degree. And, he has some connection with his family although not his father. I certainly hope he’s doing well now.

      1. S.

        Looks like he was arrested just a few weeks ago on 12/8/23 for stealing a car. 🙁

  40. KS

    My mother was adopted, in the US. But still I wholeheartedly believe adoption is trauma. Especially trans racial adoption. People expect these random babies to heal something in them. Rarely do people adopt for the genuine and full benefit of the child. Especially when religion is involved. They expected Gabe to grow up and be thankful, for what? That he was ripped from his homeland and forced into an all white family? My heart aches for the pain he has experienced. He deserved way better than them.

  41. KS

    I commented before I even finished the episode. Man, this one just breaks my heart. Makes me even sadder to know it seems as if he’s still in active addiction. I wish he could know how worth it he is. He deserves a happy life that’s free from pain. Gabe, please don’t give up. So many of us are rooting for you!