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Season 12, Episode 19

Sean

Age: 32
Location: Salem, Massachussettes
Addiction: Alcohol (vodka)

What’s memorable: Sean is one very likable dude, that’s what I’ll remember. Also, the condescending, good-life-choices brother, the co-dependent “Drunk Sean is who I fell in love with” wife Jules, the family that all denies that what Sean says happened when he was a kid actually happened. How much must it suck to not have anyone in your family believe you about something so huge? And the way Jules came through at the last minute, after Sean basically said he would disappear into the night with her if that’s what she wanted. Good on you, Jules. Good on you.

Official Synopsis: A gregarious man with an intense personality, 32 year-old Sean’s alcohol addiction is causing him to blackout and suffer seizures, which have his wife and family on edge.

Original Air Date: February 2013
Interventionist: Jeff

Comments
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Comments

  1. Sandra

    Just starting watching this episode and… WOW.
    $1,000 per week on alcohol! My liver hurts just reading that. Are there any updates on how he is doing?

    1. Jamie

      That episode hit close to home for me as Sean reminded me of my husband Shawn who is a recovering alcoholic also, could we find out on how Sean’s recovering is going?

  2. Lissa

    What a great episode. So much drama. I can’t believe his whole family didn’t believe him – I wanted to shake some sense into all of them. They reminded me of my own family issues so it was very helpful.

    I hope Sean is still sober.

  3. sis

    This episode really touched my heart…. I hope he is still clean. I just found him to be so real..and as author says” a likable guy” Wonder if hes still married :>)

  4. Jennifer

    I just watched this episode again and was wondering if there are any updates about Sean?

    1. Steele

      Sadly, he died in 2014.

      1. melissa

        wrong sean. the one that died was from ohio. this sean is from Massachusetts.

      2. Angela

        The one that died from Ohio is Sean Messina

  5. Greg

    This poor guy. His entire family are jerks. He has no reason to lie about his father while his father and everyone else has every reason to lie. His father’s defensive reaction to the allegation was all I, as a trial attorney, needed to see to believe that he is a lying dirtbag. It must be incredibly difficult to have your father accuse you publicly of being a liar when it is the father that is the liar. And the rest of the family continues the charade? C’mon. Sean would be a friend of mine if he lived near me. He’s a very likable and intelligent guy with a really crappy family. I hope he stays sober and moves away from those jerks.

    1. Ariana Bascombe

      I agree 100% with everything you said, Greg. The family are a bunch of hypocrites who clearly care way more about protecting their “we’re such good Christians, we’re above everyone else” reputations than telling the truth. How can his dad continue to deny this and act like he is right with God? He must have some SERIOUS rationalizations going on!

    2. Nurse Sugar

      I agree with you Greg, 100%.

      1. C

        You hit the nail on the head Greg!

    3. Mary

      I realize your comment was made five years ago, but I agree with 110%. Why would anyone make something so horrible up? Why would he tell one parent, the other is having an affair, if it weren’t true? It’s illogical. I personally would not be able to have anything to do with my dad if I were him. I would end contact with my mother, who is in complete denial! His brother is a dickhead. His girlfriend/wife is a drunkin opportunist that I hope he dumped not long after he came home from rehab. Do you happen to know his last name? I’m trying to find information on the social sites. Have a good one. M.

  6. Greg

    Hello Ariana, My guess is that the father has narcissistic personality disorder. To live a lie like that at the expense of your children and your wife is classic narcissism. Plus, isn’t it ironic that the episode occurs in the city famous for religious intolerance?

  7. Dan

    Is this guy still sober

    1. Beth

      I’d like to know as well. I’ve never taken the time to look someone up and have been watching for years. Also, this is not season 11 episode 11. That was a Sean also, from Ohio and He was a DJ… He died. I’d like to know what season this Sean is really off of. I can’t find anything on him???

      1. Dizzy

        He was on Season 12, Episode 19

  8. Stacy Eddens

    Sean’s father is a pathetic piece is crap. Nothing worse than a lying religious man who throws his kids under the bus foto save his own reputation. He’s disgusting. Sean, I hope you read this. He’s not worth your life or sobriety. God will deal with him. WE BELIEVE YOU. God bless. Hope you are well.

  9. Stacy Eddens

    Love you Sean! So sorry you had to go through this. Smh

  10. Deebo Cools

    This is one of my favorite episodes. I related to Sean and saw a lot of myself in him. Specifically that we were both “good drunks” and that’s only to say non-aggressive, non-argumentative, sort of sadly accepting our lot in life. Prone to the other negative consequences of alcohol without much of the meanness.

    I was also a liquor drinker, and after terrifying withdrawals, I quit for 3 weeks, and since than have returned to severely reduced drinking (think 6 beers/week as opposed to 15 shots/night) I hope Sean is sober, or has at least found a way to moderate, because you can’t drink Vodka like that and … well, Live. Good luck to him & Jules

  11. Dewey

    Sean are you out there. Hi

  12. JadeNZer

    First viewing. Wow. He was right when he said his brother could be very condescending.. And Ryan, saying hell be mad if its all a lie..Ffs, why would child Sean lie. I can totally see why the Father would lie..”their precious reputation”
    He’s so intelligent, I wish him well, and Jules also, a shame she declined treatment.

  13. Angel

    His brother said lowlife waiting tables? Wow idiot! The dad says my reputation 😂 no one knows you! Sucks that people feel that way, admit what you did free your son!

  14. Beth yuceb

    You know the father was guilty when he took his Mic off and refused to comment…..total sign of guilt. Shame on him for grounding his son for lying, as he says, asy a child, and then watching his son fall apart because of it. What a dirtbag.
    What is wrong with his mother for calling her son a liar. Husbands can come and go, but your child is always your child. Is she really that stupid? How could she call her son a liar?
    The father needs to come clean and apologize for forever to his son.

  15. Rachel

    The biggest thing I have about these comment boards is the person that had the intervention reads these boards and this guy though had a hard life drank a lot maybe his family were all assholes nobody really knows whether it happened or not nobody really knows besides them and this guy is been successful for had to have all these people post on this board all this negative stuff about their families and about their lives and how well they were they did drinking and all this stuff is anybody happy about him being sober? I think you did an awesome job dealing with the problem whether his father did that or not he was a child God only knows what he really saw he was a kid. Any man that’s been accused of that is going to say that it did not happen so there’s no way to know whether or not it really happened but the man made it through it he survived he dealt with a lot of junk and now he’s living a successful life how good is that?

    1. Stefan

      Did you not see how his parents reacted to being questioned about it? Any lawyer or psychologist will tell you that they clearly were lying or in denial.

  16. Holly Berry

    If Sean had been lying, he would not have become an alcoholic the way he did. He would not have thrown his life away if he was lying. He would’ve accepted his punishment and gotten over it cuz deep down he’d know he deserved it. That was not the case here. I fully believe he was telling the truth. He had to drink to numb himself to that trauma, not only of being punished for telling the truth, but for discovering his father’s true character; a cheater and a liar.

  17. Jeanette

    Found Sean’s FB profile – going by the photos, he looks good. (It’s definitely him – same tattoos and some new) Lost weight and seems to travel a bit now. All the information you need to join the dots and find the full name and profile are in the episode if you are curious enough.

    1. Laura Smith

      What his Facebook. Id love to see what he looks like now

  18. Brooke

    this episode really pissed me off! i cannot believe his parents, they disgust me. obviously i wasn’t there, but i 100% believe sean about his father cheating! the father’s demeanor and actions (the way he left the interview) exude guilt and the mother couldn’t even look at the camera when she denied the affair. how could she possibly know without a doubt that her husband didn’t cheat? she’s not with him every second of every day. and why would sean lie??? they talk about what a great dad larry was and what a great kid sean was and how they both had such a wonderful relationship. sean even helped his dad at his factory. WHY would he lie? the father is a hypocritical monster to call his son a liar and punish him. and what a horrible thing to say: “my love changed [for sean]”. also, i think the mother knows deep down the affair is true and she’s a terrible mother for not sticking up for her son. they both completely betrayed him and shattered his entire belief system. and to think they almost didn’t attend the intervention because they were “worried about their reputation”. WOW. so they would risk their son’s life for their REPUTATION?? i have no words for that… i almost wish sean had said “i’ll go to rehab if you admit the affair” but i’m glad he didn’t bc we all know the father would see his son die before he admitted it. i hate that sean, in a sense, forgave his parents with all the hugging, i love you’s, and no longer bringing up the affair. i guess i’m just a stubborn grudge-holder. i’ll hold a grudge until my dying breathe, but i also forgive easily and in an instant if that person admits their wrongdoing and sincerely apologizes.

    and the brother…he said he didn’t believe sean bc he no longer had any credibility…well, sean certainly had credibility when he was 15 and no one believed him then either so that’s a bunch of BS.

    and jules…jules, jules, jules….ohhhhh how i despised her. it’s hard to fathom how completely selfish she was. dizzy, i know you think she came through for sean in the end, and while technically that’s true, i don’t think she wanted to at all. i think she felt pressured to say yes and knew how bad it would look to everyone, especially sean once he really processed it, if she let her own selfishness get in the way of saving sean’s life. she was pushed into a corner and she had no choice. i was soooo hoping at the end it would say he left jules while he was in treatment. darn it!!!!!!!!!!!!! well, here’s to hoping he’s left her since. from what i saw, she’s clearly a terrible person.

    wow, what a novella. but definitely a good episode. i liked sean and i’m so glad he succeeded. i hope he’s still doing well. i’m usually a really good sleuth but i just could not find his name or fb. i guess i missed the “clues” in the episode the person above mentioned. i wish they would just post the link already, at least half the addicts’ pages have the links to fb, criminal records, news stories, etc, anyway.

    1. LiLi

      Agreed! Wonder how he & his wife are, 8 years later.

    2. Kristi Petit

      Sins of the parents are an excuse to abuse and stay in addiction. Yes, it hurts. But in the end, we are all in charge of our addiction. No one else. So admitting it publicly does nothing. The Father and Mother have that to deal with off camera.

  19. Rinna

    I hate how his family talked so much shit about waiting tables and servers. Some of my closest friends AND some of the smartest people I’ve ever met I met through waiting tables.

    Sean seems like an old soul and a really genuinely great person. I, also, thought some of his remarks came off as wise. I only hope the best for him and Jules, and hope that they both have peace in their lives.

    1. Nein

      He looks great , very healthy and good looking !! Very close with his Mom but from what I have seen he is no longer with Jules and he is no longer living in Massachusetts.. His journey was a ruff one but again from what I have seen he came out on top and he looks so happy .. so happy for him , he deserves it !!

  20. Nein

    He looks great , very healthy and good looking !! Very close with his Mom but from what I have seen he is no longer with Jules and he is no longer living in Massachusetts.. His journey was a ruff one but again from what I have seen he came out on top and he looks so happy .. so happy for him , he deserves it !!

  21. Xlio

    He’s so likeable I instantly felt a connection with his energy. He is self aware and just downright charming in a genuine way (not socio way ie Chad).

    I concur with all the above comments regarding his father and his infidelity. It maddens me. Why would he lie?

    Bottom line, he is a sweetie pie I could picture as a cool cousin of mine. And such a romantic.

  22. John

    Sean’s problems are (i) he is an alcoholic and this may kill him and (ii) his co-dependent marriage
    OK his father did this or that
    His brother is that or that
    So what ?
    The Bottle is not your friend
    The Bottle is not your saviour
    Hasn’t he sought out any help over the 8 years ?

  23. John

    So he did go and got cured
    But Jules, the wife, seemed to have such an irrational attachment to him
    Her reaction was not normal and one has to ask “why is she so needy ?”, “what went on in her childhood ?”

  24. Dahlia

    Such an insane episode. Massachusetts unfortunately has a huge alcohol problem, surprised more people on the show arent from there (or more likely im not paying attention lol). Wish Sean, Jules, and the family all the best.

    1. Xlio

      Really? I didn’t realize that. I figured being on east coast was suffering from opioid epidemic but didn’t realize alcohol is also an issue. Any theories as to why?

      1. Dahlia

        To be honest, a lot of Irish heritage. Hate to be discriminatory but it is just a fact that Irish people drink alcohol like there’s no tomorrow. BTW, heroin is indeed also a huge problem around here, particularly in New Hampshire. Sad situation all around

  25. LK

    Episodes that take place on the North Shore in Mass (this one and Sandy from Gloucester, not sure if there are others) hit me really hard. My family on my mother’s side is from here and many of them are alcoholics (I have my own issues with alcohol as well, though I grew up in another area of the state). Alcohol in general is a HUGE issue in Mass, there is a legacy of it being an issue on the coasts/the Cape especially due to the history of fishermen/sailers and people of Irish ethnicity (hope this doesn’t seem insensitive, just an observation, others even mentioned it in this comment section) living there. In spite of all his problems I thought Sean was a really likable guy and it was easy to understand where he was coming from. His whole family was the worst. Seeing their clear denial and the father’s obvious guilt over his actions (the walking out when asked about his affair spoke volumes), and then the demonization of Sean for coming forward with the truth, frustrated the hell out of me. Like do they honestly think he would be such a severe alcoholic if he made this whole thing up? And his brother judging him for being a waiter and calling him a liar for basically no reason was some of the most stuck-up garbage I’ve ever seen. Even if they never believe him, I hope he can take some solace in knowing everybody watching believes him! I truly hope Sean was able to move past his family issues and succeed, he seems like a cool and funny guy who deserves his best life.

    1. Stefan

      Indeed. I hope Sean and his family see this comment section to know how people feel about them (and that Dizzy never deletes these for being “too mean”).

  26. chia-pet

    Hopefully if Sean finds this he knows that we believe him and he doesn’t need his parents’ validation on his trauma. I recently had to deal with my father’s infidelity that has sadly shaken my faith and my impression of my father. Luckily he had the courage to fess up (albeit it was when he was about to get exposed). His dad’s a piece of shit and is portraying one of the many reasons why people are moving away from religion, especially Christianity. Hypocrites all of them yet they can’t be truthful.

  27. Nivey

    Does anyone have a link to Sean’s social media? I’ve thought of him often ever since I saw his episode years ago, then again on Vice recently! How is Jules, I wonder? Are they still married? His brother seemed like a jerk, and as far as the Dad, I 100% believe Sean and what he saw! Why would he lie? Sean was super likable! I pray he is doing well! Please anyone post a link to any updates! Xo

  28. Marie A

    Sean, seemed so likeable! I wish you nothing but happiness and success!! Does anyone know how he’s doing??

  29. Mr.Wolf

    Let’s keep it real, the father is 1000% guilty of having the affair. There is nothing for a child to gain by make up such a lie, but his father had everything to lose by owning up. The dad is an absolute coward, he would rather abandon his son than own up to his mistake. So sad that his bro and mom still don’t believe him. Sean is so strong to get sober and get past that trauma and take the pain and blame just so his father can keep his “reputation”!

  30. Lisa Wallington

    I hope that Sean is sober, healthy and happy. It’s no wonder he became an alcoholic. His dad is a frickin liar . It’s obvious he had the affair. Why would Sean lie? How the hell can the dad live with himself, knowing what he’s doing to Sean, everyday. And his mom is in denial. And Ryan is despicable and arrogant. His comments about being a waiter were reprehensible. If there were no waiters how would ryan go to a snooty restaurant and be served?! Wouldn’t it be awesome if his kid becomes a waiter ro waitress when they’re older. Or even better,Ryan loses his job and needs to become waiter to make ends meet. And the worst part of those 3 people is they professes to be so religious. They sure aren’t acting Christian (or any other religion). They’re behavior is incredibly hypocritical. Typical of many supposedly very religious people. They’re the ones who do the worst things , but hide it well. The only person who seemed to truly love Sean, the way he should be loved, is Ryan’s wife. She seems to really care about Shea and doesn’t seem to judge him. And the way she spoke about Ryan, I thought she doesn’t like the way Ryan behaves towards Sean either. The bottom line is, hopefully Sean (and Jules) are sober, whether they’re together or not. I hope they’re having productive, fulfilling lives. I also hope that his fam saw how horrible they behave and make some much needed changes also. They need stop using their religion as a weapon and as an accuse for the behavior. They need to quit hiding behind it and stop being such hypocrites. Good luck, Sean. And God bless you. Remember, you’re AMAZING!!!

    1. Stefan

      I agree with every word you say and more!!!

  31. Corina

    Honestly I feel so bad for Sean everytime I watch this episode. His father is just the absolute worst and honestly one of the worst parents I’ve seen on this show. The fact that he obviously had an affair and Sean saw that’s already traumatic for Sean as is. But the fact that when Sean exposed his father, his father grounded him, claimed he was lying and made the whole family basically turn against him and think that he was trying to break the family apart, that’s just awful. He had to tear Sean down and damage his reputation so that his own reputation wouldn’t be damaged, what a sick, terrible thing to do as a parent. Like if Sean was really lying why would he have the kinds of issues he has, the alcoholism and major depression and self harm. I feel really bad that he was made to be the black sheep, the plague of his family simply because he saw the truth and exposed it. I really hope his father(and mother because she didn’t stick up for him or really do much) feels really bad about making his son feel less of himself and so depressed because that’s very damaging to do to a young kid. Sean if you ever see this I’m really sorry for dragging your father but I honestly feel you deserved so much better than what you got. I hope you got well and I really root for your sobriety because you,like every addict, deserve it. Much love and faith in you❤️

  32. Chandler

    Poor Sean, labeled a liar when he was actually telling the truth. That’s a sure way to screw up ur kid! I hope he is doing good now! If anyone has any updates please post!

  33. Jill

    His Dad’s actions after Sean saw him speaks volumes about his lying, cheating self. If he was innocent the discussion would have been more along the lines of “I believe you think you saw that…”, then therapy, ASAP, to help him process. He definitely wouldn’t have called his son a liar & punished him, much less for 3mths. Then his attitude when they asked him directly if he cheated was such blatant self protection vs helping his son. I wish God would treat him how he’s treated Sean but, lucky for him, that’s not how God works.