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Episode 72: Ed and Bettina

Season 4, Episode 25

edbettina

Ed and Bettina
Age: 53 and 49
Location: Utah
Addiction: Alcohol
What’s Memorable: Dear god, this one. I’ve seen it probably 12 times and the dysfunction/codependency gets me every time. Married almost 30 years, became alcoholics together only 5 years ago, and now they’ve lost almost everything.  Their kids break my heart.

Official Synopsis: Ed, 53, and Bettina, 49, had a picture-perfect life, including three adoring kids, a dream home, sports cars, motorcycles, and a respected place in their church community. But six years ago, Ed made a bad career move and ended up unemployed. He and Bettina lost everything they had worked for. They began to drink, and quickly became alcoholics. Ed has been hospitalized for internal bleeding, and Bettina for withdrawals so excruciating she thought she was dying. Their children have begged them to stop drinking, but it only strengthens the bond between Ed and Bettina, leaving the children to wonder, “How do you intervene on a married couple?”

Original Air Date: September 2008

Interventionist: Candy

Categories: Alcohol, Candy, Childhood Physical Abuse, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Most Unforgettable Episodes, Season 4

Discussion

8 Responses to “Episode 72: Ed and Bettina”

  1. I worry for Bettina and the fact that she has not seemed to have opened up about the traumas she faced as a child. They don’t go away, trust me, I know. But they aren’t as scary when you talk about it with a therapist and they can give you a new perspective. I am curious as to how she’s doing today.

    Posted by Nicole | August 18, 2015, 3:47 pm
  2. Their episode isn’t available on Amazon, at all.. which makes me wonder whether they relapsed and something tragic happened OR they’re clean and rejoined the Mormon community. What they are doing is super taboo in that culture, I wouldn’t be surprised at all if the church is part of the reason this episode isn’t available anymore.

    Posted by Emily | August 27, 2015, 4:12 pm
    • yes, it is very taboo. I grew up as a Mormon in Provo UT, which is where the LDS culture is more like a CULTure. I recognized the provo liquor store in the episode but it looked like they are in southern Utah county (Springville, Spanish Fork probably) where the culture is almost as bad. Southern UT county is huge into meth, and SLC has lots of heroin. This place is literally no different than anywhere else when it comes to “evil” stuff like drugs, sex out of marriage, especially rape, child physical, mental and sexual abuse, etc. I know because I’ve seen all of it first hand and experienced more sexual abuse/rape here than I did when I lived in CA by far. Some men around here aren’t respectful of women and act like they are the “authority” and act like the opinions, thoughts and feelings of women don’t matter as much as their own. And if you’re not the perfect Mormon then you must be a slut and automatically want to have sexy with them. This place is just like Anywhere, USA even though people fake their whole lives and convince themselves it’s not the same. If anything I think it’s worse because you have to put on a perfect front much like Ed and Bettina did. They probably went to church on Sunday like nothing is wrong. But that’s where the problems start… No one can help you heal if there’s “nothing wrong!” I’ve heard that Utah county has the highest rate of plastic surgeries per capita (even above places like LA), highest teen suicide rate, a huge problem with teen homelessness, 50% of homeless teens are LGBT bc one of the LDS church leaders basically told people to abandon their LGBT kids, the highest prescription drugs prescribed per capita, and the list goes on. The strive for perfection is never ending! And the culture is so critical and demeaning in my experience that you will never measure up causing you to feel bad about yourself for no reason! Then you judge others to make yourself feel better thus continuing the vicious cycle. I used to be very judgemental growing up bc that was all I was exposed to.

      I will note that lots of LDS people are awesome and helpful and kind and understanding. Some of the kindest people I’ve met are LDS but so are some of the meanest, including several of my rapists. It’s very polarized. But again it’s just like any segment of people – there are all kinds of people yet the difference is they try to act the same instead of embracing their differences.

      Unfortunately I live here in Provo now, and it’s very hard to find friends because you’re either a junky or a perfect Mormon and there aren’t many in between. If you’re the typical Mormon you will fit in great and everyone will be nice to you! If you’re not well then I guess you’re shit outta luck! Salt Lake City and Park City are way different, literally like 40 miles away but a completely different vibe, SLC has the feel of a bigger city next to the mountains with 4 ski resorts. Park City is a beautiful mountain city with ski resorts right there in the city. And both of them are predominantly not LDS! I don’t even have a car right now to go there often and get out of this hell hole!

      I used to live in Orange County CA and the San Francisco Bay Area CA and I wish I could go back to either place right now. I made friends easily and was respected by men actually! I couldn’t believe it when I moved there how much people actually liked me! I was (and still am) in shock at how popular I was with people there! It is so hard to fit in here in Provo and I was (and still am) the loner and no one liked me for me. I never did growing up bc I didn’t feel “good enough” for the “good Mormon kids” (75%+ of the school) but I was too naïve for the “bad kids” and so I felt lost and judged no matter what. Nothing has changed except on the inside I’ve been learning that I am worth something and I do matter, and am worthy of love and respect.

      Sorry for the rant on this topic, but it really hits close to home (literally and figuratively) and I can’t even begin to describe what this place is truly like. I know my perspective is skewed bc I was raised in an abusive family, but I still know the hurt and pain the LDS culture can cause.

      Posted by Nicole | September 1, 2015, 12:05 am
      • Hey I live in Salt Lake and am from Muchigan. 2 years sober.
        Give me a shout💝

        Posted by Colleen Wooten | February 21, 2017, 2:17 pm
      • Hey Colleen, j just saw this message so sorry for the delay immeeaponse. I have a car now so I can get around. Maybe Dizzy can send you my email address so we can correspond privately 🙂

        Posted by Nicole | June 21, 2017, 3:20 am
  3. People need to use this message board more. It rocks. Yohoo anyone out there

    Posted by Dewey | June 22, 2017, 7:15 am
  4. Wish there was an update on these two

    Posted by Flo | September 1, 2017, 9:10 pm
  5. I am currently rewatching the series and check the site for updates on each after every episode. I thought for sure, out of everyone, there would be extensive updates on these two. So much so that this is my first comment out of almost six seasons. I hope to hear something soon.

    Posted by Taryn Morrow | October 3, 2017, 10:09 pm

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